My husband has an event lighting company and we were at a wedding vendor ‘meet and greet’ recently. He introduced me to a professional woman who spoke about her event venue very seriously and pragmatically. And as the subject turned to social media, maybe I mentioned my blog, I spoke of how I’d entered into the social media world having no idea what it was about, mostly dreading it. And that I was surprised to find my self-esteem had bloomed through its use. And her stoic face spread in a smile and she said, “Good for you.” It was an unexpected response and that’s why I valued it. Because she knew the value of adding to one’s self-esteem. And I liked her.

See there’s a lot of us “older generation” who’ve resisted this social media “trend”. We’ve needed to be beaten over the head to consider our use of  social media. It was “new fangled” and we never even had a problem with rotary dial phones. But some of us had to concede to its use as necessary. I had a blog that needed promoting. Some others have books or personal causes that need exposure and support by sharing. But those are truly small whys compared to the bigger benefit. When you are on social media, community is almost inevitable.

===Fear Fears Community”===

— Jon Acuff —

We are community oriented beings. We get a sense of worth and gratitude and grounding when we are in a community. All of my life, I had never truly felt a part of one or maybe I didn’t believe I was deserving of one. And I totally did not expect to find mine online ! Yet it turns out there are so many like-minded people all over the world and if you speak honestly and from your soul-truth, you’ll bump right into them.

I’m loud and talkative when you meet me but I wasn’t like that online at first. So when I got a little less shy and began to ask questions and comment and speak up, I became a student of socialization. I saw that most people were nice to you and would respond. I saw that if you were truly kind to people they appreciated it. And I saw that the only way to have a friend was to be one.

cobalt door in Annapolis for Blogging for self-esteem post on

And the gift I received in return was the knowledge that I have value and am worthy just because I’m here. Because I’m nice and have valuable points and views to add to the world. The people who aren’t invested in me, who aren’t my blood or need something from me, but have willingly given me validation, support, and kudos? They have been the blessing to my self-esteem and pulled me up off the ground. Them and a good therapist have taken me from a 4 to a 7 on the self-rating scale of self-esteem.

I’m at a place now where I’m ready to step out a bit more. I’d like to continue to inspire and spread kindness and support. If there’s a cause I should know and lend my support to, let me know. If there’s a question I can answer, ask. If there’s a community I can create or a service I can provide, I’d love to hear about it. I am stacking my aspirations up and next year promises to be an even better one. Thank you for reading dear people.

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  1. So brilliant. I’m glowing after reading this. The interconnectedness of us all is becoming more “tangible” through social media. Community awaits. The gift I was given in my meditation yesterday morning was.
    There is no aLONEness.
    There’s only allONEness.

    1. Ohh Tina I love this. Sorta smacks of socialism but whatever. I do so love aloneness to alloneness.When people tell me that I’ve hit on a place that means something to them, I feel purposeful within my community. The same one that gave me the courage to speak!

  2. Oh yes ~ there are so many ways to use blogging unhealthily, but I think when we use it as a tool to share the best of our thinking and reach to others, it really does build that self-esteem <3

    1. Yes to the best of our thinking Claire, ourselves. And when you actually reach out and interact with like and lovely minds , that’s when I get to find out that people are nice and they like me ergo self-esteem skyrocketing. Because strangers’ opinions mean so much more!

  3. Love this one. There is a silver lining to most unfamiliar things but you can only find it if you take a leap of faith. I’m so glad you did and continue to live your Shalavee big life…ox cheers to more adventures in blogging.

    1. Oh thank you so much Heather. Yes to the silver lining but you have to have a little faith that it’s there to end up there. Yes this is my big girl life and I’m beginning to be proud of it. Blogging has been the truest adventure, outside of parenting, for me.
      Love to you and Happy Thanksgiving,

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