Shalavee

Tag: boundaries

  • I Wish

    I Wish

    We had brownies with candles. And we blew them out altogether. A ritual we’ve kept on New Year’s Eve for the past several years. Except our family was separated this year. So, we got to it several days later… This year hasn’t begun as smoothly as I hoped for. I wish… That the time I […]

  • Boundaries Are Hard to Make

    Boundaries Are Hard to Make

    I’d rather not make them because boundaries are hard to make, especially with strangers because your family will still love you.

  • Chosen and Unchosen Changes

    Chosen and Unchosen Changes

    I’ve noticed how I feel differently about my life as we pass the one year anniversary of the beginning of the pandemic of 2020. I feel a lot calmer. How did that happen? Because changes happened, both by choice and by time. I found myself saying no to a string of requests for my time […]

  • Sharing Our Space and Our Lives

    Sharing Our Space and Our Lives

    I had a birthday visit from my oldest today. She’s a surrogate daughter, an adopted sister soul to our family. And she spoke of feeling that need to have a nesting partner. That next chapter where you feel the need to share your space with someone and your DNA with the world. I have always […]

  • How Hard is it To Pay Yourself Some Respect?

    How Hard is it To Pay Yourself Some Respect?

    I am suddenly at a place in my life where I realize that life is harder for all the respect I haven’t been asking for. I find myself irked because my kid doesn’t respect me. Or my husband takes me for granted. Or my Mother just expects I’ll do that thing for her. But I […]

  • Listless

    Listless

    Last week was like a test week for me, not that all the weeks haven’t tested me but it felt most certainly that way. I’ve just been unable to get enough separate time and that starts to eat away at my personality. I was feeling wobbly and sad last week. We had moment after moment […]

  • There is More to Say in Silence

    There is More to Say in Silence

    People have commented how they have heard the birds chirping more recently. I think the birds are chirping the same as they ever do but we’ve slowed our busy selves down enough to hear them. This pandemic is indeed causing a jarring shut down yet I understand that once you’ve stopped fighting the change, you […]

  • Testing, Testing, is this Parent On ?

    Testing, Testing, is this Parent On ?

    This first week of school is notoriously rough for our youngest. There are new teachers, new routines, and new buses to acquaint themselves with. And I fully expect our train to derail somewhere in the middle of back to school week. I was slightly mistaken in that there weren’t as many neurotic breakdowns and a […]

  • The World Pushes

    The World Pushes

    The world is full of people who are all fulfilling their destinies. Their GASes are theirs. They believe that they need to make these GASes (give a shoots) happen in order for their lives to be “Happy”. And then you have yours. And sometimes, their goals encroach, overlap, and eek into your life. Boundaries are […]

  • Searching For Self Boundaries

    Searching For Self Boundaries

    Remembering that we learn from others and especially our parents how important we are. Without this early context we are doomed to search for it.