This morning, I was considering how hard it is sometimes to make a decision. Especially with our epidemic perfectionism, we are often paralyzed by the idea of making a “wrong” decision. But truly, the hardest part about making the decision is making the decision. The carrying out of the decision and the consequences are a matter of wrote and history at that point.
Choice and changes are inevitable. “If you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice”, from the song Free Will by Rush . There is no way out of change. If we buck our leaders, our mothers, or ourselves, we will create a place where we are alone and mistrusting of our lives. The indecision we experience over a decision is either a symptom of our mistrust of ourselves or can end up causing us to mistrust ourselves more if we give our indecision any credit.
Instead, if we know that 50% of our choices will not work out, we can assume that 50% will. And we could afford ourselves the respect that any choice we make will be the best we are capable of at the time. When my husband was in a room helping to negotiate a labor contract, the lawyer for the management turned to him and said,”Management reserves the right to make bad decisions.” Touchee.
So instead of undermining ourselves with doubt over whichever choice we make, we would be better off to just concede that we do the best we can with the information we have at a given time and go with our guts. Trust in ourselves is a muscle we build every time we choose. And to respect our need to grow this muscle and that we always do our best, we can be compassionate self-leaders.
I encourage you to reserve the right to make bad choices. Grant yourself permission to be wrong. But you just might be right.
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Great post my friend! A tough theme for sure. I’m much better now in relation to decisions, but the decisions made in the past still torment me, the IFs, if I had done that instead of this? But one thing one put very well, is that at the time of the decision we were not the same person as today, we didn’t know better. I DIDN’T KNOW BETTER, so true!
I do believe that we do everything just as we are supposed to. I always have. I just have faith that way. Saves me ferom the torment of pretending like I ever had any other choice. I hope I’ve helped you toward the same! Thank you for this Elizabeth. It makes a difference to me.
Yes! I am quite handy with this trick… :>)