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“Do You Work?”, He Asked

I finally scheduled the procedure to have a fatty lump taken off my belly this week. I’ll spare you the gory details. But while the surgeons had the scalpel poised over my belly, he asks me, “Do you work?”. I said not in a traditional job but I do work. “Are you a housewife?”, he asks. I respond that this phrase is outdated. “Well what do you call it then? “ he says. Homemaker? Domestic Engineer?

I found myself explaining that I work very hard to maintain our life and our home plus am a writer, but that old nagging self-worth question about being defined by your earning power is still a part of me. I came of age in the 80’s. Bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan. And never let him forget he’s a man

The question is triggering for me because I am uncertain of me. Remember I just went through this with Fiona in this piece.  Who cares if he’s a chauvinist. That’s his wife’s problem. What all of this points out to me is that I need to be in a place where I feel certain of the value of what I do. Where I know my own value and do not question it."Do You Work?", He Asked on Shalavee.com

I consider myself a Mindful Mother.  To me, success is raising kids who will be proud of who they become. Kids who are gracious and self-assured, kind and smart. I am a Homebody. I love to make my nest pretty and mostly prefer to spend a day at home alone than anywhere else. I work very hard to create an environment that’s clean, creative, and happy for me and my family and that’s no small feat in a nasty old house built in the 1870’s."Do You Work?", He Asked on Shalavee.com

So it would seem that I need to write myself a better elevator speech so that in the future when I’m asked what I do for a living, I can recite a clever and insightful speech on my worth as a human being. Or I can just tell them it’s none of their business.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

What 2018 Taught Me

I felt like I was making great strides in growing myself last year, 2018. I was feeling more sure of what my creativity was giving me both personally and perhaps professionally. I offered up a Wholehearted Living piece to a writer friend’s blog. And I started to create my own theory on the inverse relationship of creativity and anxiety. I felt a rhythm was coming.

And then I suffered an anxiety setback that set me reeling. I abandoned my aspirations and hunkered down to ride out the storm. And I took myself to the doctor’s and asked for medicinal help. Because pain is your body telling you that it needs help.What 2018 Taught Me on Shalavee.com

Why had I waited so long, I asked the doctor. He said “Stigma”. I had made it my goal trying to prove that anxiety can be conquered by therapy and creativity. And I was admitting I was wrong. I felt defeated and yet, once I had the medication cooking, I felt the hope of perhaps finally moving from a stuck place. And 9 months later, I was right. I have grieved my ego loss and moved on to what was beyond. Possibilities don’t feel like burdens of tasks I’m unable to do but rather hopes for a fun future.

Last year taught me that you have to do whatever it takes to take care of yourself. You have to ask for help and sometimes, give up and do something different. And you are the only one who can make the best decisions for you. Even if those decisions are hard to make. Because I think the hardest part of making a decision is making the decision. After that it’s just following through and seeing what happens next.What 2018 Taught Me on Shalavee.com

My wish for 2018 for myself was for perspective, safety, joy, inspiration, value, chances, strength, hope, and comfort. And “to live within my creative zone often enough to keep me joyful, true to myself, and to be able to appreciate this action and the interaction with my fellow people who know the truth of me.” I’d say that I fulfilled most of those intentions and then some last year. I feel creatively satiated and held by a growing community and I am trusting that I will take care of me in the coming years.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Co-creating with my Family

You know that I’m all about creativity. I’ve been described as an ambassador to creativity. Putting a slice of yourself into the world is affirming in the most wonderful ways. And I also believe that community creativity is a sure fire way to join people together.Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

My family is regularly subjected to family art projects by me. In the Fall, group pumpkin carving is mandatory. We go out and pick our pumpkins and one night before Halloween, we sit at the kitchen table, draw out our jack-o-lantern faces, scoop out, and carve our pumpkins together. Then have dinner and watch a favorite scary movie with the jack-o-lanterns lit up on the bookshelf in front of us.Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

At Easter, we all dye Easter eggs together. I make sure I have the eggs cooked and we all try different techniques like tye dying and rubber bands and drippy eggs. Our fingers get dark with dyes and we chatter and say”look at this” and there is a palpable feeling of pride in creation. It makes us feel good to create and we feel good together while we do it.Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

So when I had this idea to art these plates for the garden fence wall, I thought why not involve the whole family in making the art? We chose animals and insects that we’d encountered in our backyard. I bought the right paints for ceramics. I downloaded the animal pictures. Then I cut out the animal shapes from clear sticky back shelf paper and adhered them to the plates.  The animal shapes would come out white after we’d painted them and peeled  off the shelf paper.Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.comCo-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

My son chose to paint the turtle and the firefly. My daughter painted the fox, the raccoon, the squirrel, and the rabbit. We joined together with great sincerity and intention in our now air-conditioned garage and set to work to create art. And that’s what we did. Each persons’ was different yet they were all united by a theme. And just this weekend, I finally mounted the last four as I had to go buy more plate hangers.Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Co-creating with my Family on Shalavee.com

Creating memories with my family is always an ulterior motive. But luckily my kids are creative and grab any opportunity to find themselves within whatever medium is laid in front of them, be it pumpkin, egg, or plate. And long after the kids are gone, I’m still have a piece of them in my backyard.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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