A “Good Day” is one where my children don’t give me a hard time. “Yes Mom” and “Sure Mom”, “How can I help Mom” they say. When I have slept without my body waking me up from some sort of weird pain. A day that is not overbooked and everything rolls out as planned. A good day doesn’t have me popping Analgesics or Nsaids for back or Si pain.
This day would also include time to myself doing something I needed to do and felt proud of myself for accomplishing. Whether that’s a household or garden chore or writing a blog post, I long to feel accomplished. And like the house work and the family care-taking chores, I have to weave these actions throughout my days and life in a way that gets these tasks done and doesn’t tax me terribly.
I do notice that I would prioritize the work of care-taking my family over my own self time. And I could over plan a day trying to get everything done only to feel like a failure at the end because I physically just couldn’t do it. One good Menstrual backache will take you out for a day. Fatigue and resistance can take you out for days on end.
That’s why we have to be realistic about planning our lives to garner our achievements. We need to make plans with our worst selves in mind, but we still need to make plans.
With my recent completion of the 100 Day Project, I knew for certain that I could carve out 15 to 30 minutes of uninterrupted time every day for myself. And that means that I can possibly do that again. And I may even be able to do more. But, I still have to give myself space and credit if my body wears out or I really can’t muster the mental energy.
Because as much as we want to be accomplished, I also know that the presence it takes to heal ourselves through some tough days can take a different sort of toll on our bodies and minds. So compassioning ourselves through our even slightly traumatic lives is a bigger deal than we’d initially give ourselves credit for. Let up a little and you’ll permit the choices to accomplish whatever you need in the time that it takes.
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