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When I was pregnant, I was told the very fact that I cared so much about what kind of parent I’d become meant that I’d be a good parent. What takes a potential good parent and steers them to the wrong side of the road? Their own lack of self-compassion and emotional intelligence or awareness….
I allowed myself to lay in bed in these past several mornings. I don’t feel the need to leap up and go downstairs for coffee. Most of the time, my daughter’s already up so there won’t be guarenteed time for myself down there. And there’s no need for productivity to happen immediately. This is just…
I am considering how to emerge from the “Lull”. I’ve been working on so much behind the scenes and in my head. Caught up in the doing and not the showing and telling. Coming to terms with, acknowledging, establishing, understanding, and claiming my inner and outer worlds. I always struggle with what is important enough…
I get the feeling that in the old days, people had kids to add more hands to the labor pool. The more bodies, the better to help plant, pick, and pickle. And yes, they were all jammed into small cabins on the prairie or in the hollow much like we are today. Welcome to our…
Remembering that we learn from others and especially our parents how important we are. Without this early context we are doomed to search for it.
At my daughter’s school, the children’s behavior is monitored daily by a stoplight inspired grading system. If you’ve behaved yourself , you get on a green status. If you received a warning, its yellow. And a bad choice will get you to red status and probably get you sent to a principal’s waiting room, or…
When my son was little, if I saw he was doing something that would hurt himself intentionally, I’d say, “Don’t hurt my friend”. I say this to my daughter as well. The idea is that I care about them as much as I would a friend seems to be not as obligatory but a choice…
I’ve always said she wants to be my hat and sit on my head. When my daughter is feeling needy, she can’t be on top of me enough. Everything that she emotionally needs is drawn from me and it’s more than draining. The give and the take between a girl and her mother is exhausting…
Since being a mother, I’ve had many “growth opportunities” to rethink how I express how I’m feeling about myself or my children. These are called AFGOs (another fabulous growth opportunity). Today, instead of yelling at and being impatient with my daughter for crying again for the umpteenth time about her pain which I perceived as…
At our dinner party the other night I asked my friends what it was that they remembered having the crazy notion to do and suddenly doing at the age of 25? Three of us said we had gotten married. Because I have noticed recently that there’s definitely a switch that gets thrown developmentally in a…
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