puddle hopping on Shalavee.com

You may remember, or I’m informing you now, that last March I taught a blogging workshop. My premise and guiding theme for this was “Your Why is your How”. Because sometimes we get so bogged down with the how of a thing, we forget that the why will get us through all the hows we ever meet. What I said in my post-mortem about my workshop was,”(the hows) are secondary. It’s your whys, or maybe your why nots, that will lead you to or will thwart you from starting a blog. We acquiesce to our bossy fears claiming it’s our hows that are our problem. But I propose ‘I can’t because I don’t know how’ is subterfuge.”

And ironically, I hit a wall with writing submissions a while back. I had continued to submit writing pieces to the types of sites that weren’t quite me. And I kept feeling that loser outcast sting every time I was rejected. It was like some horrible self-denegrating loop and then I was just done. I’d proven that I was in fact not a good enough writer and I no longer even understood why I’d wanted so badly to be published in the first place. Not worth the pain and agony, time and effort. Until I saw a site that really did fit the type of writing I do. And then I was even more terrified.

Minnie at the playground on Shalavee.com

What’s my Why? Why do I want to write? Why do I want to publish? What is the pay-off for continuing such painful torture? This was the subject I decided to mull and discuss with myself while I had a long drive to make the other day. And this is what I came up with.

I thought , why can’t my Why be altruistic? To share my thoughts and hopes for the sole purpose of inspiring someone, anyone. Helping someone out of a life rut. And then I asked, what is my own why for reading and following the people I do? And this is what I answered (out loud in the car where no one could hear me but me):

  • To be inspired

  • to find answers

  • to spark process

  • to learn a step

  • to gather the “aha” knowledge

  • to connect and make friendships that provide inspiration and validation

So I then thought, switch those around and claim them.

I write and create to :

  • Inspire

  • Offer my answers and solutions

  • Spark others’ process

  • Learn, while I’m writing, what I think or feel about something

  • Offer my knowledge for others to then gather

  • To validate and connect with others

To be of service to a community is a great thing. And that is truly where my heart lies. So much so that I think that I don’t want to spoil that by selling anything. That somehow my selling would cheapen my altruism? But the next chapter to learn is about valuing myself enough to appreciate that others are always valuing me even when I don’t. And often they have wanted to be supportive of me if only I’d give them an opportunity to do so. And everyone, except me, understands that bills need to be paid…with money…that you earn.

Stick around lovely people and see what happens with that.

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  1. Hi Shalagh, great post! I always write many ‘why’ in my journal, but very few ‘because’ , questions and questions, now you made me think, i should work on the answers, try to figure out the ‘because’. Keep writing, you do it beautifully.

    1. Oh thank you so much Elizabeth for stopping by to read and chat.Knowing your why is knowing your own purpose. And defining that sets you free to be you. Thank you so much for your compliments. Truly means the world to me.

  2. We should be required to answer the why on a regular basis. Boot camp helped me with that. I also won coaching with Jane so I really need to create a giant list of why and how!!

    1. Oh Wonderful Jennifer. I won a branding course and I think I’m just at the point where I’m ready to use it. Yes, Why is soooooo big. An anchor. And definition in general gives you purpose. Love to you!

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