A while back, I wrote a post titled, I’m No Longer a Runner. I bemoaned the fact that my apparent SI joint malformation was increasing in pain and that it may stop me cold from doing the one thing that had always been my happy exercise: running. Because when we are faced with chronic pain, we think we have to give up hope. We begin to compromise and make due and tell ourselves there are other ways we can be happy. Never an excuse to stop following the breadcrumbs to our wellness but it slows us down with the not knowing.

I may still be a runner yet on Shalavee.com

I am happy to say that I am running again. The steroid injections eventually helped, although it seemed like a long time for them to kick in. I can take Ibuprofen and go for a run/walk and my affected joint only aches. I can totally settle for that because these early Summer days are exquisite and all I want to do is go running and huff the heady lemony scent of magnolias in bloom.

I think sometimes we get to worrying and apprehending the future, especially if it includes pain, and we try to come up with solutions that if we were to buy, would solve all the dissonance. If I didn’t want to be a runner, than not running would be fine. Except it isn’t, because in my heart of hearts, I am still a runner. I love the breeze and the smells. The rhythm and honesty of it. And I love that I trust myself to just start and stop and go where I want. Running is such a longstanding part of me that I hope I can keep doing it for a long time.

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  1. I’m reading a book, and one of the most recent subjects covered where these types of situations. The suggestion was actually to accept the possibility that perhaps you may need to give something up if that is the worst possible outcome of the situation. Hopefully though, you’ll find that the worst is rarely the actual outcome. In accepting the potential worst outcome, you’ve already made a deal with your mind that it is a possibility, which leaves your mind free to go do other things. If you find the circumstances are right to give that thing another try, it’ll give you more data and possibly a way to modify whatever you need to keep that thing in your life, even if you have already accepted the possibility that at some point it may not work. I’ve been working through a lot of this recently myself, as there are a lot of things I realize I may not be able to do again, but there’s still plenty of things that I can do, and plenty of things I haven’t even done yet.

    1. I didn’t get back to you but I wanted you to know that this is wise advice. Those of us that are catastrophizers need this practice indeed.
      Thank you for your ear too!

  2. So glad you found a way through the pain. Sometimes discomfort is something we have to learn to accept to be able to do the things we love. I’m creaky after I garden but the joy I get from my time in the garden is worth it.

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