I’ve been thinking about embodiment. This is the best word I can find to describe this deep need to reoccupy myself. I want to feel as if I know and understand myself truly, madly, deeply.

I have this image of snapping myself into a chest plate that fits perfectly. Being inside myself and feeling that comfortable almost imperceptible comfort of wearing the perfect pair of jeans. I just want my purpose suit to fit and comfortable. Do I need to go to a tailor/life coach to define it? Maybe.

In my dreams, I keep losing things that define me. I am headed to a flight but I don’t have my ID. I lose my phone or my wallet. How often do we define ourselves by our possessions, our people, or our bodies instead of our hearts and souls?

I am mother warrior. I am dispersed and tired. I am the sum of things yet to be done. All my projects become little spirits jumping out to haunt me.

Yet the Autumnal winds have come to blow the cobwebs away. They ask me to wrap my arms around myself and be present for what is next. To reclaim all the thrilling thoughts and eurekas and ahas that I have had in the past several years and decide where I want to begin again.

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