The Artist I Am
Screw the Results, Get Caught up in the creative Process
In the midst of this creativity Challenge , #OurCreativeJanuary , and I recognize what my purpose in life is. It’s to not only keep creating something, anything, but to insist that everyone else needs to too. Not for the credit or the compliments on how perfectly you’ve done it, but how lovely it feels to be in process in community. I say screw the results, get caught up in the process. We all need to create, even if we don’t call it that. And sharing what we create makes the process feel even better. I am convinced that in...
read moreThe Our Creative January Project Kicks Off
We are well into the “Our Creative January” project. Thought maybe it’s time to return home to my blog and begin a new year on this amazing creatives’ community foot. Such diversity, such enthusiasm, and such positivity. I am co-hosting with Nina Spolar so we can continue to support a creative community together throughout the year. She’s focused on creativity’s positivity and raising the vibration of our world’s around us and I’m focusing on noticing and crediting ourselves with everything creative that we...
read moreOur Creative January Challenge for 2021
Announcing an Our Creative January Challenge to start off 2021 on the creative right foot . A creative community challenge I am hosting on Instagram. Since 2017, l’ve dared to host #ourcreativeselves community projects and #Soul_selfie challenges. As l continue to emerge from my creative and low self-esteem shells, these challenges have given voice to both my creative and soul searching selves and my communities. I forget this. I forget myself. Often. So this coming year, l want to remember myself and engage in more community...
read moreSharing Our Space and Our Lives
I had a birthday visit from my oldest today. She’s a surrogate daughter, an adopted sister soul to our family. And she spoke of feeling that need to have a nesting partner. That next chapter where you feel the need to share your space with someone and your DNA with the world. I have always been a nester. And there was no one worthy of doing this with me until I met my husband. I knew he’d value the fathering job as much as I honored the idea of mothering. But Boy Howdee, sharing constant space with these mooks for nearly a year...
read moreTake a Perfection Break in December
I love the way careful empowering ideas and inklings spread in my online communities. This week what I heard was slow down. Perhaps we need to agree to take the month off together. Yes, I am still the event planner for December and that is a lot of work in and of itself. So maybe I need to let go of the rest of the “shoulds”. Maybe it’s not the best month to start a diet. Or create a regular exercise routine. Or write a blog post everyday. Or gather more email addresses for our businesses. Instead, I look forward to creativity galore,...
read moreHow Hard is it To Pay Yourself Some Respect?
I am suddenly at a place in my life where I realize that life is harder for all the respect I haven’t been asking for. I find myself irked because my kid doesn’t respect me. Or my husband takes me for granted. Or my Mother just expects I’ll do that thing for her. But I realize that it’s just me beginning to realize that up until now, that’s all been Okay. Respect starts with self-respect, a boundary on what you will permit others to ask of you and what you feel you are willing to do. And while some women can...
read moreSelf-care Sunday Thoughts
The rain has finally stopped and the blue skies are filled with cartoon exhaust clouds. My son’s friends are all happily yelling at the video game they are playing. The smell of chili and banana bread permeate the house. Am trying to squelch the pain of my SI joint which has returned with Ibuprofen. And I’m trying to figure how best to continue engage in the impossible task of getting my Mother out of her house. It keeps coming back to this. I wake in the morning and wonder what is the next best thing. I want to get her to where I...
read moreWhat if You Did it All Right But You Were Looking at it All Wrong
It’s not as if I don’t try. As Sara Bareilles sings in her song Armor, “You make me try, try, try, try … it’s all I ever do.” But what if the efforts you make are good, it’s just your expectations of what you can humanly accomplish are off ? What if you’re so used to never getting it right and never doing enough that you can’t see how much you’ve accomplished. You can’t see the forest for all the trees. You know I’m talking about myself. When am I not? I have been told many times by many...
read moreDrops in the Bucket Fill the Bucket Up
I realize that I have been an all or nothing girl all my life. I want the pretty garden immediately. I want the pounds to come off overnight. I want world peace or else! And this thinking renders all of my efforts worthless. If I only get part of the project done, with this mindset, it wasn’t enough. And this is like trying to drive with the parking break on. When I truly started to believe that drops in the bucket fill the bucket up, then I started to enjoy and appreciate my own efforts. Even 15 minutes of concerted effort to clean a...
read moreI Carry the Shame
I carry the shame Of the impoverished upbringings of my parents. Abuse and neglect. I can’t wear stained or torn of illfitting clothes when I leave the house. We don’t do that. I carry the shame Of the unwanted weight on my body. Not maintaining my appeal for men and equally, for caring what anyone thinks of me, especially men. I carry the shame Of not fixing my anxiety Of passing it on to my child Of not being enough. I carry the shame Of staying stuck Of not rising, using my talents for more. Of not burning brightly like they...
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