As you know, I truly disregard other’s judgment of my expression of feelings here. This space has always held safety for me. Even when I’ve been attacked, I still know that I am entitled to be honest about me. I sometimes think I should be more so.
And what I’ve come to realize is that not only do people truly not understand that it’s Okay to be not Okay, they think that my expression of self-doubt or fear to be me is somehow a reflection of instability. After all, who thinks this is Okay?
I Do.
In fact, if we were all to admit our self-doubts, our humanity more to one another without assuming that person is funny farm material, we might get to route of some of our problems more quickly. But instead, people are horrified at my humanity. It must mean something awful has happened to me.
Am I considering self-harm? Bahahaha hahahaha! I have never gone there and don’t plan to. Or maybe my anxieties just play into others’ anxieties and they can’t read what I write without being triggered into anxiety. I get that. Maybe my husband has driven me to it? He’s the funniest kindest man I’ve ever met so, no.
I find it sad that we are so clammed up with our feelings that we can’t even recognize and value honesty as just that. If we find compassion for one another and our expression of pain, it may help us find compassion for our own pain. That’s apparently not an option. But I wish it was. So I’ll continue to confess my feelings. And your choice of how to respond is yours to do what you want.
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And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.
6 Comments
Dear Shalagh,
Never waver from who you are and how you express yourself. You are who you are in each moment, and that is continually going to change. Those who avoid expressing themselves live in fear, and will never experience the richness of life unless then can move beyond it. The richness of life includes ALL of it; the beautiful happy moments and those moments of despair and anxiety. It’s all wrapped together into the package of our one life. Yes, to compassion, to expression and listening and truly hearing❤️
Jenny, I love that you came here and gave me this gift. Thank you so much. I will never stop being me and I hope one day to appreciate and understand more who that is.
Much Love,
Shalagh
I always admire your honesty about yourself. It helps me with my own feelings
Thank you
Thank you so much Cindy. I write for myself but it makes me happy to know that my words mean something to someone.
Love, Shalagh
You continue to do what you do. Others who criticize are fearful of their own feelings and do not know how to respond when feelings are brought to the surface. I hope for them that they can find some guidance to find their feelings.
I have known you for quite some time, though we have never I feel a bit of a kindred spirit with you. Keep writing and sharing your wisdom. Love ❤️
Allie,
You are so kind and I thank you deeply for this. I feel the same about you. And if you anywhere on the Eastern Seaboard, I’d be glad to meet up with you!
Love,
Shalagh