My husband and I are from the same camp of hard work. In fact I’d say we’re both addicted to the feeling of accomplishment we get after completing our projects and tasks. So much so that to not be crossing off items from a to do list may feel slightly like failure. There’s no doubt, we’re achievement addicts.
We apparently have forgotten about the “being” part of human being in our drive to do. And thus, there will never be enough “done” to get the feeling we matter. It’s a hamster’s treadmill of promises we overachievers get caught on. It will all be perfect after this project gets done.
And then along comes Summer.
Summer is a concept/mode in which you are asked to relax. It demands you become a relaxed outdoor person with nonchalance and a tan. You are supposed to stop focusing on your list and unplug. Really? Yet, As hard as it is to let go of the “going going” and “doing doing”, I secretly sigh with relief because when Summer comes because it’s just the excuse I need to give myself permission for some long thwarted relaxation.
This year I saw Summer coming and prepared myself. I took care of all my self-care items to begin to prepare for the mandatory mood shift, all while still accomplishing my list. Proactivity at its finest. And then I invited friends over to christen the start of the relaxing and celebrating season with an all day chat-fest. And that felt like I’d accomplished a lot for the group of us. We all needed it.
I’d taken care of all my chores in preparation for the gathering. My floors were vacuumed, my shopping done, and my laundry caught up. And I was able to allow for me to do something I wanted to do and not just something I had to do. I sat all day and laughed and drank and entertained and I was a Being. And I’m thinking this is the way to do Summer alright.
So for all you Doers, who are reading this and thinking you probably need to do more for you. You do. I told my husband the other day that you can’t get more work out of a dead mule. Let Summer give you permission to have a seat and not do laundry today. Or ask someone else to make dinner (call for carry-out) and go chat with an old chum on the phone for hours. These are messages to yourself that you are worth more than the sum of you check marks. You get to enjoy and relax just as much as the rest of the world on holiday.
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