Yes you have too much to do. Or should I say, I have too much I think I can do. The emails are piling up. There are stacks of unread magazines. There are outdated frozen soups in the freezer. And there are items in my closet that just don’t fit me well. There are dust bunnies with bad attitudes under our beds. And there are more important tasks than these looming in my future too.
As long as I’m still terrified of doing what I’m already putting off, then all those tasks get pushed back further because I have a priority hierarchy in my head. And when I add the yet to do list of tasks to get done before I go away on my trip or before the holiday event happens in my living room, I am drowning in my to do’s, Inundated with must do’s, and desperately wanting to be UN-inundated. Because vacations and holidays are supposed to be relaxing Damn it!
The trick to being UN-inundated is to actually do those things that you’ve put off. You need to take your fear and stare at it and tell it you will best it. Even beginning a dreaded task makes it less dreadful. It’s amazing how everything runs much more smoothly after that happens.
I did the hard things. Drove through the doubt storm. And I must say I was both pleased with myself and relieved and rattled by the fear which is my impostor syndrome stuff. But suddenly I was freed to go clean out my closet and my freezer. I redecorated for Fall and am about to go dye my hair.
Yes, you will get it all done if you keep at it. Drops in the bucket fill the bucket up. But what of the sabotage by overwhelm? Attempting to take on too much is a great and mean way to get yourself to feel like a failure.
“I saw a driveway today doubled up with two rows of cars that looked like they were all in need of some sort of repair. And I realized that that’s my mental driveway. With that many tasks to do, it will never look like I’m succeeding even though I am. In fact the opposite may be true. The amount of accomplishments I do get done daily is staggering considering all that is on my plate. And I’m the only one who can’t see this.”
It’s one thing to say I really expect too much of myself, and it’s a complete change of lifestyle to actually weed away the overwhelm. And especially at Christmas when we’re all expected to be event planners, it’s easy to lose perspective on exactly how much we’re asking ourselves to do on top of all the rest of life’s necessary tasks. I have been a Superwoman all my life who never gave herself credit for the miraculous things I did. So this season, I’ve an eye on me to be mindful of what is enough and what is too much.
Did I mention we’re going out for Thanksgiving dinner?
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