Again my nose was my source of misery. Read This Burning Head Pain is Familiar for the background story on my phobia.Although it seems the pregnancy had kept the bugs out of my body, now the bugs wanted back in. My eyeballs felt like they were going to pop out of my head and hit the wall. And my head felt like there was dirt packed into it. I am a believer that the misery one endures should never be for not.

I went to the doctor. And since I was breast-feeding the baby, we opted for the weakest drugs to begin with. And I went home and I got a cold in addition and I was returning a week later saying the drugs didn’t work. Quelle Surprise.

As my head continued to throb week after week, I was snapping at my child and I was miserable. I went back to the doctor and requested the bigger badder medications. And wondered why I had allowed this to happen in the first place. I had chosen the weaker drugs at first thinking that was best for my child. That’s why.

As a mother, if you don’t take care of yourself first, you are really no good for anyone else. I know we mothers tend to think we keep the world revolving and everyone alive by our doing. And that we haven’t anytime for ourselves. But If you are no good, your care taking is sub standard as well.

Eventually, I went back for the better meds and took another flavor of allergy medicine. Finally it has healed and apparently to avoid this from happening again, I need to seek further professional help like a new ENT doc and an allergy specialist.  And my lesson was learned for the larger picture.

If we don’t take care of ourselves, we aren’t the best us for the ones we love. And surely our loved ones want us to feel better and not snap at them. Feeling good should always be a priority for me. And martyrdom is not the glamorous state it once was.

4 Comments

  1. Oh yes, I have been that martyr too! I’ve been struggling with insomnia and I’ve put off going to see a doctor about it. I’m embarrassed to say that it’s been a year of not enough sleep.

    Going next week. My guy and my girl deserve the best from me, not cranky me.

    • Good on you Sandra. You have inspired me more than a few times and I would love to return the favor. You are more than the sum of your doing and the girl and man like your being. Enjoy your summer darlin’! I hope to see you this fall.
      Love,
      Shalagh

  2. So true this….why do we all have a martyr complex? Or is it superwoman syndrome?!

    Love to you and yours x

    • My thought is that women felt powerless but the entitlement to their pain from oppression was what kept them feeling powerful? It’s an old tattered hand-me-down that thwarts empowerment. But remember you can take your cape off and still be super.
      Love to you concert going newlyweds.
      Shalagh

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