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Waitressing Nightmares

I had another waitressing dream last night. They recur, these nightmare dreams. Since I spent so much of my life waiting tables, I go back to that job. The dreams go like this.

I am at the dream made-up restaurant and there is a problem. It could be one of the following. The tables are too many and I don’t have the time or menus or pad to write the order down with. I don’t have the uniform or the shoes or a section assigned to me. The tables are far far away from the restaurant or have just been taken by another waitress.

It’s all bad and stressful. Last night, the other waitress was taking all the tables and I was feeling like I wouldn’t be able to make any money this way. And she was way more efficient than me anyway. The old “why should I if someone else can do it better?” I’m unnecessary?

I am pretty good at translating dreams for other people. Sometimes mine are harder. Once I had a dream image of me sewing my face on with a quill pen. And I love that image’s literal quality. Because that’s what you do as a writer. You create a persona by the stories you tell and the way you tell them.

I am slowly inching forward with a writing career. It’s not moving faster than a turtle’s pace. And a recent bit of good news has probably got my subconscious a little worried.  I truly believe that my style is uniquely mine and no one can be me but me. So if me is what you want to hire, I’m the only one qualified for the job. And I was a damn good waitress.

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11 Responses to “Waitressing Nightmares”

  1. Dig Gillespie says:

    There’s no truer truth than there’s no youer you than you. Oh, and if it’s not too much trouble, could I have a refill on my tea?

    • Shalagh says:

      I’d have taken you for an espresso kinda guy. And there’s no one youer than you either.

      • Dig Gillespie says:

        Espresso? Really? No wonder Roxy gets the best sections.

        • Mom my says:

          Don’t see yourself as spastic just like me? Roxy’s a no talent hack.

          • ps “mom my” is my stage name. otherwise known as other log-in name

          • Dig Gillespie says:

            I have come to realize the wisdom of Professional Dream Waitress Shalagh. I callously disregarded her assessment of me being “an espresso guy”. The fact is I’ve never had an espresso, so in the interest of research I tried one. Uh, it’s my go to now. While Roxy may give me what I ask for, only the best of the best, which is what PDWS is, will give me what I really need. As a former cab driver, I can appreciate this level of uber-competancy and professionalism. “You want to get downtown taking Charles Street? No you don’t, you want to get downtown as cheaply as possible, if it’s all right with you, we’ll take 83, get there faster, and I’ll charge you a flat rate equal to if we had taken Charles street.” or “You want to go to the strip club? That’s fine if that’s what you really want, but you are 3 young, good looking guys, if you want to meet and talk to actual women, I suggest Canton or Federal Hill.” No more Roxy, I’m only sitting in Shalagh’s section from now on.

          • Shalagh says:

            PDWS used to be liked to the energizer bunny. I was 30 pounds lighter then. But you’re right, I have a knack for telling it like I see it. And always with an giant dose of love. I would have enjoyed a ride in your cab immensely and a drink at a bar to talk endlessly about whatever. You’ll always be seated in my section even if I’m retired.
            Love,
            Shalagh

  2. Y says:

    Sewing your face on? Wowzers.

  3. Amanda says:

    Love this post, and your new profile pic. In my recurrent dream, I’m in school – with no binders, syllabus, glasses (unable to see the blackboard), etc. I think it’s the same dream – a feeling of being unprepared for some new challenge I’m facing in life. Had these dreams daily after I had my first baby, then they came back when I was pregnant with my second. Someone else taking all your tables is such a clear image! Brings a feeling of definite injustice to mind.

    • Shalagh says:

      That’s very enlightening to know someone else has the same affliction but different dream theme . Nothing like children to make you feel like you’re completely incompetent. Thanks for being the one to tell me you notice my changes Amanda. I’m trying.
      Love,
      Shalagh

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