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Living in Paradox

It occurred to me recently that life necessitates living in a paradox more than we seem to be comfortable with. Our need to categorize and be perfectly right has us believing there’s a right way or there’s the highway. But I’ve bumped into several situations that would seem we need to lighten up and accept we can live on both sides.

 

I read somewhere, “You’re allowed to be Ok where you are and want something different too” and I froze. What? How is that possible? My disgust with my body would necessitate changing it, right? But now I am being given permission to be Ok with my body and also create an intention to tune it up simultaneously? Whereas before I didn’t believe I was really going to meet my goal, thus that disgust, if I then give myself permission to be OK with where I am now, then I feel more confident that I’ll be there for myself in guiding the progress towards where I want. Self-trust then allows for me to occupy this seeming paradox. Aha!

Living in Paradox on Shalavee.com

I truly do believe that to move on from anywhere, you need to accept that you are there where you are then. So it would stand to reason that in any circumstances, you can accept /acknowledge/understand being there (not always be angry or disapproving) and this will give you the power and space to make a shift from there onward. So for me, that would sound like, “My body is OK the way it is. I am no less beautiful for the couple extra pounds I adopted at Christmas. I am not broken so I don’t have to fix it, I just want to tune/tone it up when that opportunity becomes available.”

Living in Paradox on Shalavee.com

 

Life is absolutely made of way more paradoxes than we care to acknowledge. Is it a paradox to like your body well enough the way it is and want to change it? Is it a paradox to love your husband and have crush on Brad Pitt? If what we have is good enough for now, then we can look to other possibilities without recrimination or guilt, that feeling of being at a deficit or deficient isn’t helping anyway. I can acknowledge that eventually I’d like a new couch and for now, this one is good enough. And that opening up for possibilities allows for more being OK with my now. We all need to find a way to be OK with our nows.

 

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your email box. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest  too. I am always practicing Intentional In-touchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

 

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Craving the Shift

Oh how I crave the shift. I want to see my world as all possibilities, untangled with preconceived can’ts. I want to see my children as cherubs and my career as chosen, doable, and successful. To come home to my body and my house and see them for the fabulousness they contain. And each day passes by me as I await the shift.

From the wickedly talented recently deceased (ovarian cancer at my age) memoirist and author Amy Krause Rosenthal via her book Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life,

“RETURNING TO LIFE AFTER BEING DEAD

When I am feeling dreary, annoyed, and generally unimpressed by life, I imagine what it would be like to come back to this world for just a day after having been dead. I imagine how sentimental I would feel about the very things I once found stupid, hateful, or mundane. Oh, there’s a light switch! I haven’t seen a light switch in so long! I didn’t realize how much I missed light switches! Oh! Oh! And look — the stairs up to our front porch are still completely cracked! Hello cracks! Let me get a good look at you. And there’s my neighbor, standing there, fantastically alive, just the same, still punctuating her sentences with “you know what I’m saying?”. Why did that bother me? It’s so… endearing.”Craving the shift on Shalavee.com

The shift is when you see the ordinary as not so much. Your perspective is skewed enough for you to appreciate the mundane, even if momentarily. And it can allow you to understand yourself and your role in the world a little more. Certainly death causes shift as does vacations. How do we go about causing a perspective change without nearly dying or paying to stay somewhere else? Have you had any perspective shifts? What did they look like?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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Know Ledge

It occurred to me that what I know is what I know. It is the sum of what I feel to be truthful. Worrying about what I don’t know takes me to a place of uncertainty and anxiety where I’m assuming what I don’t know can be used against me somehow. Perhaps that fear, the insatiable need to know to give me an upper hand is what feeds the news industry’s flame. I believe what I need to know will find me.Know Ledge from Shalavee.com

But if I assume and trust that what I Know is enough for me and my life, then I end up on that Ledge. This would be the place above the din where I have the perspective from which to sit and survey my life. The place where I can make thoughtful decisions based on my values and the outcome will always be right no matter what. Because I made my informed decisions not on what I think you think I should do, but on what I knew to be the truths that best fit me and my family.

Most likely we all are a little more knowledgeable than we’d give ourselves credit for. I believe that you always have all the knowledge and support you need at any given point, it’s that perspective from your personal ledge you may be missing.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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Nothing Changes New Year’s Day, or Does It

I believe that everything can change on New Year’s Day and yet, I also believe it doesn’t. I believe if you change nothing, nothing changes. I also believe that if you have a change of heart, everything changes, and that can happen every single day of the year. Nothing changes on New Year's Day on Shalavee.comNothing changes on New Year's Day on Shalavee.com

Faith and Hope are boundless and can change everything and this change can happen any day of the year regardless if it’s a Tuesday or the moon is Full. We are such immense and amazing products of what we believe and are infinitely more powerful than we recognize and believe. Nothing changes on New Year's Day on Shalavee.com

So here’s to upping the ante on what you believe your life and potential is worth in this coming year. And to gathering your support closer to hold you accountable to the wonderful outcome that this could bring. I am wishing this for you and for me, that you are what keeps me aligned and courageous and hopeful for what I can and will bring this coming year.

Happy New Year!!!

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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Perspective Saves You From Feeling Sucky and Unlucky

During the first week of school, Eamon’s teacher told the class that Bullies don’t know, or care,  that you are very important to someone in your life. You are just not too important to the bully, who in turn wishes those people in his/her life who supposedly love him/her would act like it. It’s your perspective of your worth that can stop the bully from coming after you. You matter whether you recognize it or not.

People are mean to one another. Empathy and compassion are missing in many places, in many people. And that’s where we need to fill it in for ourselves. Yes we need others to care for us and take care of us. We desperately need to matter to the world and let those people whose job it is to help us take care of us. Besides parents, these can include health service people, police, and government employees. But even when you are out asking for the help, sometimes their own life problems get in the way of helping you through and you feel your worth get consumed by the system. And you may be left wondering WTF? They never called you back from the doctor’s office or the budget billing got screwed up. Your check honestly  got lost or the coupon expired while you weren’t looking. It’s not fair but it’s not personal.perspective will save you from a sucky sentence on Shalavee.com

Here’s the trick. Their reactions and non-reactions don’t have anything to do with you. Just as it’s so hard not to interpret the bully’s actions as a reflection of you, it’s also hard not to see the system dropping you on the floor as meaning you are not worthy of support. But you are worthy of it. Because innately we know everyone is worthy. And your opinion here is the only one that matters, the only one you will believe in the end. How will you reassess the situation to see your benefits, your options, and gain your perspective on your worth?perspective will save you from a sucky sentence on Shalavee.com

So when you start looking for more signs that you suck, please stop. It all depends on which way your mind wants to tell the story. If you knew that the bully got beaten by his Dad everyday, would you feel differently. Or that the government tax person or nurse that messed your paperwork up have children who are dying or drunks, would you feel differently? There’s too much mind reading going on that has you as downtrodden persecuted heroine. Perhaps that story needs to be rewritten. No one cares as much about you as you can today.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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