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How Mrs. Doing was Forced to Have a Seat

My old nickname used to be the Energizer Bunny. I like doing. I have valued myself for the amount of doing I get done and that’s the way I’ve coped with my stress (see industrial overfocused). And while it has worked for me that I made it through the holidays feeling pretty proactive and deserving of a few relaxation hours, I have been on a familiar treadmill during January with an obligation to coordinate a fundraising event in addition to my regular parenting band. And so I kept the relentless treadmill running in my head week after never-ending week. Until this past week when my body said “Your sick, have a seat.”

As I laid there with my stomach demanding all of my attention to its achy knot riddled state, I really didn’t have any aspirations to do anything else but lay. I may have spent 15 minutes on my feet that day. And I was OK with that. Because I had done enough towards what needed to get done. And I would be well by the time my event rolled around. I was just having a seat. And that isn’t always a bad thing to be in a place of enough.How Mrs. Doing was Forced to Have a Seat on Shalavee.com

We all need a reset point. We have parties to celebrate transitions from one year’s being alive to the next. We have parties to celebrate marriages and graduations. These are all rests and markers before we continue. And I think we need to be very mindful of supplying ourselves with the same feelings of stop and rest and reflect in our more daily existence. Breaks in routing spark imagination.

It took me a few days to truly recover from the my stomach thing. Happily I may have lost another pound on my 2018 weight loss journey to fit back into my clothing. And there was truly nothing that I missed doing. My floors are still as dirty as they were before I got sick.How Mrs. Doing was Forced to Have a Seat on Shalavee.com

I was able to type while slumped in my chair and write a couple of blog posts but that was the extent of my productivity. I was truly OK with Mother Nature telling me to have a seat. And that would be a first. Maybe I’m not valuing myself as much for my measured successes but for the satisfaction of my soul? Or maybe I had a good enough head start. Either way, I feel well enough to continue. And soon this will all be a nightmare.

If you enjoyed what you read, please subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your email box. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional In-touchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Not Enough is Not Enough is Not Enough

Enough, like Esteem, is one of those concepts I revisit again and again hoping to coax out the secrets to unlocking the spell it holds over me. I am certain that the key to releasing me from the state of not enough lies closer to me than ever before. Can you feel the “not enough” curse in your life too? I was Looking For Good Enough back in February and made some realizations here.

There is an epidemic of consumerism, an obesity of possession. People still mesmerized by the media that tells them what they should value can be bought in wagon loads for less at their local Superstore. And the economy rumbles on on the debts from home-improvements and blatant expenditures of your neighbors. My in-law conceded, “You’ll always be in debt so you might as well enjoy yourself.” Not Enough is Not Enough on Shalavee.com

But what if all that buying still is never enough. What if all your attempts to fill your soul up with stuff doesn’t do “it” for you. Then what? I offer then  that this is not the way to salvation after all. We’re smart beasts, why would we keep falling for this?

I offer that we are just lacking in a connection to our own impact on our world.

That we have lost our faith in our own personal contributing worth. That we need to create a safe space within ourselves to be us instead of trying so hard to be someone else.

That enough starts from within. Always has. Always will.

And perhaps even being aware of what we are unhappy with can open our eyes to be more consciously aware of what enough might actually mean to us. Not Enough is Not Enough on Shalavee.com

I found recently that when I was forced to stop doing doing doing and have a seat, I became more appreciative of what was going on in the present moment. That my kids laughter and the carry out food I didn’t have to cook were mini-miracles. And it was enough for that moment.

Here’s to hoping to find a place to be safe within ourselves, myself, where I am mighty and important to the world. That my unique perspective is valued by me and by you. That my being alive is enough to get me started in directions that make me proud and happy. And that I the “not enough” begins to feel more like a lie than the truth.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your email box. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest  too. I am always practicing Intentional In-touchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Living Ideal Lives That Have Nothing To Do with Stuff

 

As I drove I considered the concept that perhaps some of us are already living our ideal lives. My therapist pointed out to me once that I was living an enviable life of constant creativity yet all I ever wanted to do was dwell on those things I didn’t have yet and hadn’t accomplished yet.

 

It seems such a profound concept that we may be living the lives we always truly wanted except our vision is too clouded to see this. That we can only see that we are not living by the standards society tells us we are supposed to want. That if we were to understand that health is so important and wealth isn’t, we’d get to exercising instead of going for another Wal-mart run.Living Ideal Lives That Have Nothing To Do with Stuff on Shalavee.com

 

If we appreciated that we had family and community and a roof, that we’d already know we have enough. Except that’s not what sells. Not enough sells more. And when we buy, other people make money from our money. So we keep running on the wheel for our dollars. We keep making cheesy good snacks to eat while watching a sporting events when we could be making art or friends or love to and with the people around us.

 

And the moment you and I realize that we are following their rules, we’re gonna bust out laughing from our protective shells and begin conversations with ourselves and our world that we hadn’t dared until now. Just thoughts as I’m driving past the Wal-mart.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your email box. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest  too. I am always practicing Intentional In-touchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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Know Ledge

It occurred to me that what I know is what I know. It is the sum of what I feel to be truthful. Worrying about what I don’t know takes me to a place of uncertainty and anxiety where I’m assuming what I don’t know can be used against me somehow. Perhaps that fear, the insatiable need to know to give me an upper hand is what feeds the news industry’s flame. I believe what I need to know will find me.Know Ledge from Shalavee.com

But if I assume and trust that what I Know is enough for me and my life, then I end up on that Ledge. This would be the place above the din where I have the perspective from which to sit and survey my life. The place where I can make thoughtful decisions based on my values and the outcome will always be right no matter what. Because I made my informed decisions not on what I think you think I should do, but on what I knew to be the truths that best fit me and my family.

Most likely we all are a little more knowledgeable than we’d give ourselves credit for. I believe that you always have all the knowledge and support you need at any given point, it’s that perspective from your personal ledge you may be missing.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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Looking For Good Enough

I’ve gone through spells of uneasiness recently. Days or patches where something is off. When I don’t feel great about what I’m doing or the day itself. And I realized it may be a little voice that says things are not quite good enough. My expectations and my actualities are not evening out.

I wrote in my journal,”I suspect my expectations are to blame. And I know I never give myself enough space or credit for my actuality. I continue to wait for some fairy godmother perspective shift.

I suspect that somewhere somehow I got it in my head that there would be this eureka moment when I would get the biggest Aha of my life and I’d completely break the confusing code of what am I here to do and why. I’ve been waiting for a lightning strike while I am actually moving along anyway, just a lot slower than my expectations.

Because when you deep down believe it’s not good enough, your poster life doesn’t match up to your real today life. So I thought, what does good enough really look like and let me paint a picture of that to put on my wall to stare at instead.Looking for good enough on Shalavee.com

What Good Enough Looks Like

When I don’t go looking for reasons to be unhappy with my life and myself.

When I stop doubting my ability to parent myself, to rely on myself, to follow myself to true happiness

When I trust myself

When I see myself in the mirror and don’t judge what I see badly

When I look at any possibility that tickles my fancy and say I can do that

When I feel the value that my being here has just because I’m here

And as I was wandering around reading random internet posts yesterday, I fell upon another concept that I think is also at work here. On Liz Smith’s Connected Life blog, she speaks here about Deepok Chopra’s concept that in each of us there is an everyday self and a deeper true self. The true self is essentially your soul. It is where you are when you feel contented. Your true self is certain and clear about your life where the everyday self can get easily influenced by chaos and other people’s opinions and will forget your true self even exists.Looking for good enough on Shalavee.com

It takes a good deal of mindfulness to train your brain to concentrate on thinking and existing in a truer place. And that is what I need to keep my eyes on when I feel a not enough spell coming on. I almost laughed out loud today when I realized that I already know what I know. And that just because I don’t believe it doesn’t make it any less true. When I write, I write what I know. And I find out what I know by writing. So I guess the only way to find out if I know enough is to start writing. The stories we tell ourselves keep us from finding out the truth. And I suspect the truth here is that I certainly know enough to write a book on what I know!

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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