Sometimes

Those last few days of school leading romantically into summer were full of my own promises to myself. For actualizing creative plans and getting things done. And then one baseball event led to another with literally three days in a row of events. And my husband needed me to run errands for his business. I had a tooth cleaning appointment plus some husband flavored desk work.  And I watched as those beautiful 70 degree weather days passed me by.  I had wanted to be out in the garden doing the last of preparation before the hot days came and the fair days went. Like sands through the hourglass…

I felt myself getting irked. The anger and resentment were making me depressed and sad. And then I stopped to listen to my brain. Seems my husband’s anxiety had become mine. Since his business sustains us, what he was anxious about was my problem too. And in my codependent way, I was unable to say no.

I found myself saying no when he began with the next task I could to do for him…while he was on his way to go fishing. And thus the sometimes’ came to mind.

Sometimes…

…it’s OK to say no.

…your scheduled gets jammed up with multiple obligations (month of June) and you get lost in it. It’s unavoidable.

…you need to promise to treat yourself to a massage when the rough patch is all over. And then keep your promise.

…you need to be a better parent to yourself.

…the best you can do is react. Until the day you give yourself permission to be proactive.

…I’m not in the mood for anything else but spacing out and playing on Pinterest or zapping through all those cable channels we have.

…I need to have faith that my summer will return to me in its sprawling beauty. Then I will grab the moment and run with it down the beach like a pair of hippy kids who are high on life on their summer vacation.

Happy Getting What You Want from your summer.

Shalagh