It’s Saturday and it smells like muffins. Some moments were a struggle. My boy says, “It seems like you’re always either having a really good day or a really bad day.” I said this one isn’t too bad but sometimes I just have to move through it.
Like getting Fiona dressed and her teeth brushed. I don’t necessarily enjoy those activities, especially since now that I’ve said “Fiona not in Mommy’s face, it’s the one place she wants to put her hands and her toys while I’m down on my knees dressing or diapering.
I spoke to my friend about my regular Motherhood overwhelm and she said it seems like maybe, since I had a rough childhood, maybe I’m really hard on myself. I’m trying to create this mythical childhood for my children and my expectations may be high. I agreed.
I have buttermilk in my refrigerator because it makes yummier baked goods. Today I found the recipe for buttermilk muffins in the Joy of Cooking. I made half of them with chocolate chips and half with strawberries. My children have no idea that other children don’t probably get freshly made pancakes on school mornings. They take their luck for granted. And as I said in this post, I’m OK if they don’t truly know the hardship that other children suffer.
The muffins are for a church potluck where Eamon gets to find out who his secret mystery friend has been. We’ve given our children family, community, clean diapers, milky sippy cups on demand, and unconditional love. And muffins. And that is truly all that children need to grow up mostly functional. And I’m good with my motherhood over-achievements so far. Tossing in some radical self-care just in case though.
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4 Comments
It sounds like you are giving your kids a wonderful childhood. As a mother of four, please be kind to yourself. Remember that self time is not selfish.
So what you’re saying Mala is that if I want to feel guilty, it shouldn’t be for over indulging my children but for underindulging myself. Oh wait guilt is bad too. Not to worry, I’m getting better and better at taking care of myself and not deferring to others for permission.
Thanks Mala!
Love,
Shalagh
Driving my son and a friend home from his freshman year in college, I mentioned something about the breakfast I had made his younger brothers that morning before school and his friend asked, “Dude, your mom got up every morning and made you breakfast?” My son said, “Yeah…” Like it was no big deal, and the friend replied, “Dude, you are so lucky.” Made my day and my son learned a little something too. Keep overachieving. It’s worth it in the long run.
Aha Karen that is exactly what I imagine will happen to Eamon later in life. Love your perfect use and placement of the Dude.I don’t know if I could stop overachieving even if I tried. But I may need to sometimes.
Thank you for your thoughts!
Love,
Shalagh