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My Kid and Mindfulness

Ironically, mindfulness isn’t something I gave much thought to until it seemed to start popping up everywhere I was. I wasn’t mindful of mindfulness. Being aware of what you are feeling and thinking isn’t very American after all. Mindlessness is encouraged. Copious television watching and numbing techniques don’t encourage mindfulness.

I want more for myself and for my kids however. Knowing that the only way to teach is by doing, I am outspoken about what I am doing and how my insights are growing me. I also talk to my son often about owning his choices, belonging, self-esteem, and other subjects that come up. So when he gave me a reflection yesterday of a more thoughtful sort, I was sorta blown away. Mindfulness and my kid on Shalavee.com

He is having a tough time, as expected, adjusting to middle school. A transition from childhood to adulthood, there are a lot of expectations to mind and I’m not sure you can be ready for that. I’d advised a while ago that maybe he needed to create somethings to look forward to. And he said yesterday that he may have needed to get into a better place knowing how things go and that he could handle them before he could put things in place that he could look forward to.

We all need to listen harder to the little ego voice that says I would be happy if I had such and such in my life, be it more music or free time or walks in the woods. And then our adult selves can go about making sure that the happiness quotient is filled weekly. Because I don’t think we’re the sum of what we do. I think we’re the sum of the happy and proud and included moments of our lives. And those are up to us to create with great intention.

Mindfulness and my kid on Shalavee.com

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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I Wish People Would Pay Me To…

There are many many inspirational women out there doing inspirational things together. To feel their energy as the co-create is exciting. I stumble across Andrea Scher’s blog Superhero Journal and her post about what would you love to have someone pay you to do.

She and her compatriot listed these :

I wish people would pay me to hold their hand on airplanes.
I wish people would pay me to find faces in their food.
I wish people would pay me to doll them up and take their picture.
I wish people would pay me to throw things out of their closet.

And these:

I wish people would pay me to come over and let me make them soup.
I wish people would pay me to come to my house and lay quietly on my couch.
I wish people would pay me to play with their hair.
I wish people would pay me to make music compilations for them.

And then she wisely states:

These are bread crumbs. Little points of light. Things that light us up. Things that bring us joy. Things that give us clues about who we are and where we are going. “I wish people would pay me to on Shalavee.com

These were my wishes that I could be paid for :

I wish people would pay me to color code their books on their bookshelves

I wish people would pay me to make breakfast in bed for them and then join them

I wish people would pay me to tickle their cats’ tummies

I wish people would pay me to witness their humanity and hand it back to them

I wish people would pay me to cozify their bedrooms and glorify their sock drawers

I wish people would pay me to write what’s right with the world

I wish people would pay me to tell them what’s wrong with their parenting

I wish people would pay me to watch foreign movies

I wish people would pay me to critique their biscuits and gravy

I wish people would pay me to tell them how fabulous they look in Fall colors

 

Worth it just to internet surf every once in a while. I’m blogging with abandon this month, every day a new post. Search every day of October, 2016 on the calendar in the side bar and you’ll find every day filled. Rounding up my Soul Selfie challenge soon. And another creative bootcamp has come to an end. But there’s always more creative trouble to get into.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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The Last Three Days of My Souls Selfie Challenge

My Souls Selfie Challenge just finished up. A week of prompts with the intention of sparking a little more thought about what we are and think and feel. It was a little less scary for me this time because I knew the people joining me wanted me to do this again. And I’m always glad to oblige people when they want to do soul-work.

When you add many people’s energies and soul thoughts into a collective pot, you certainly have a meatier stew to chew. Read and see the first three posts here. Here are Thursday/Nostalgia, Friday/Trust, Saturday/Weight-wait, and Sunday’s/Night posts. If you are on Instagram, you only need to tap the hashtag #Soul_Selfie and you can see the whole page of marvelous posts devoted to introspection and self-love.

 

💚Day 4 🌸 #Nostalgia 🌸 #Soul_selfie challenge💚 As a Mom, I don’t dwell in nostalgia. Remembering my children’s life moments doesn’t choke me up too much. Because I know I was there. When i’m behind the camera, I’m plugged in to our now. . . I am a “Be Here Now” kinda gal and when I see a picture, I remember being happy and present then and don’t feel sad to have left the moment behind. I know lots of parents who go right for the parenting regret mode. These lovely little ones are of me but not mine. I am always letting go. . . Perhaps it’s the promise of other joys to come that has me looking to the future and not back at the past. I aspire to create many moments to remember fondly. And to never regret my choices is to be confident that I’m creating a past that I’m proud of and need not rethink. I may be slightly full of shite here but mostly i’m truthful. . Joining @rae_ritchie_ today for her #ExperienceOctober2016 challenge with this prompt. And will merge again with her the day after tomorrow for her Night prompt. #taleswithfriends #Soul_selfie #challenge #FionaMariePeach #EamonSpencerPeach #siblings #kidsofInstagram

A photo posted by Shalagh Hogan (@shalaghhogan) on

💚Day 5 💚 Trust 💚 #Soul_selfie 💚For me, trust has to start with self-trust. Having spent years making decisions that weren’t in my self-interest, I’ve recultivated a trust relationship with me, the girl who’d given up on me, who knew I’d let her down and had stopped trying to believe. I had to prove I was trustworthy one action at a time and reform that lost bond with me. . . Healing my mistrust of others, the isolation and suspicion in being alone, that is also self-created when I’ve kept my vulnerability to myself. If I put on a false face to gain other people’s acceptance, how can anyone be trusted when they like the inauthentic me I keep giving them ? Playing a game of I make you like me keeps us from trusting yet we are worth the company and trust we crave! . I trust myself now. It was little steps of kept self-promises, peeks of the real me to strangers on IG, and I came to see that I was reliable and pretty cool. And for these efforts, my anxieties have decreased immensely as I am the real me telling the truth to myself and checking for my happiness all the time now. #challenge #taleswithfriends ##trust #liveauthentically #writer #selftrust

A photo posted by Shalagh Hogan (@shalaghhogan) on

💚DAY 6 🌟WEIGHT/WAIT🌟 #Soul_selfie 💚 At 50, my clothing is two sizes larger than In my twenties, Yes, the fluctuations in my weight are natural, a chronical of a woman’s life. Bit it’s been a torturous road to finally know this, . . When I get mad at myself for being old and human, I can be mean about my body image. I can call myself defective, fat, less than. I go to blows with the ideal American Barbie doll ideal. But my daughter will hear every whisper, So I hope I speak of being healthy in front of her, not deformity. . . I am not a number. I am the beautiful reflection of my thoughts and values. Most days, my worth lies in the quality of my character. In the wit and charm I have earned from my life. . . I fought to lose weight this year.The first time in a long time I’d tried. These last 10 pounda are stubborn. They are my fears manifested. The visual layers of ” I’m afraid I can’t ” added on, obessed upon until they look real. . . So i declare this next time I choose again to try to lose these last 10 pounds, I’ll pick a starting date and make a food plan, hedge my bets. It’s not personal, it’s science. Hoping that being a kind but determined parent to myself will be the final factor that brings me back to the me I want to be. A me that is not defective, just in need of a tune up. #taleswithfriends #weight #challenge #liveauthentic #truth #bodyimage #selfimage #vulnerability #women #collage #Papercrafting

A photo posted by Shalagh Hogan (@shalaghhogan) on

🌕 Day 7 🌕 #Night 🌕 #Soul_selfie 🌕 The night is regenerative restorative magic. Quiet, crickets, contemplative. It is the space and time to discover what I am, what I think. . . It is the next phase of life, the inner keeping of my soul. The stop, redirect, purposeful action of being 50. It’s a book read and understood. It’s a journal page filled with quandary. Night is the quiet contemplation of what’s to come and the relinquishment of what will never be. . If only I didn’t pass out so quickly, exhaustion of the motherhood that recreated me, night might not be a forgetten friend. Head bobbing for sleep, clinging to the quiet private gold time. Ah the memories of glory days passed pubbing and laughing. But for tonight, I am all the possibilities of just being me now! . . This last day I rejoin @rae_ritchie_ and her #ExperienceOctober2016 challenge crew for the prompt of Night. Tag your posts with both hashtags and see who’s joined in. . As Carol Burnett sang in my childhood, “I’m So glad we’ve had this time together just to have a laugh and sing a song.” My thanks to everyone who participated and encouraged me and others to dig a little deeper and take a look at what’s there. We are real people with real needs, concerns, and joys. I always want to hear what makes you you. “So long.” #soul_selfie #taleswithfriends #moon #selfdiscovery #liveauthentic #challenge

A photo posted by Shalagh Hogan (@shalaghhogan) on


So ends my second Soul Selfie Instagram photo challenge. I’m left feeling full and happy with the connections we’ve made, the inner work that we put ourselves to. We’ve nudged and budged, listened and inspired eachother as a community is apt to do and I am certain we’ll do it again. Word is, I’m thinking about February. So perhaps February, May, and October are all good months to clear out our inner cobwebs, own our stuff, and move along.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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