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We Gather to Feel Hope

As she poured us some of her white sangria, our hostess Annie admitted that she was compelled to organize our Saturday night gathering since she wasn’t a participant in the Women’s March that afternoon. I hadn’t traveled to Washington either and so the six of us, all Moms, sat and shared our feelings and concerns. And I felt grateful to be able to gather and share my fears and doubts with these women. It was validating and affirming and necessary. And as each of us had brought a nibble and a sweet, our opinions and stories were equally nourishing.We Gather to Feel Hope on Shalavee.com

At the close of the lovely evening, we all offered that it was so nice to be able to speak our truths and hear them echoed back. That we’ve never experienced this fearful uncertainty in our country before. As one woman’s wise husband had pointed out, we were not alive during Watergate or the assassinations of JFK or Martin Luther King.This election is our horrible US citizen moment (if you don’t remember the second Bush Administration).

And even though nothing in the world “changed” last night, our inner worlds changed tremendously. We felt like we were facing this together with like-minded women. We felt safer in our collective souls. And that was something I’m so very grateful for. I think we all were. I look forward to hosting similar gatherings in the coming year to keep the spirit of hope alive for myself and anyone who would join me.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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What You Must Think of Me

 

It would be impossible not to consider what others think of me. Were I not a writer, you couldn’t prove I care. But I must care a little to want you to read what I’ve written. Or is it possible to be thankful that others approve but not base your own value on what others think. That has been a problem my entire life. Until now.what you must think of me on Shalavee.com

Surely I can come off to some as a bit pompous and a loopy, talking about all this touchy feely stuff. Liberal spoutings of a girl who refuses to see what the world really is. But I submit that every last thing you see and perceive is based on your assumptions, your perceptions, and filtered by what you need to have it be.

My anxieties have run my picture show for a long long time. You may have noticed I am always busy. I kept busy, never had any ending so I didn’t have to hear what a crappy job I did. Never stop, never get criticized. I really cared too much about what you might think so I distracted you and me with busy. But unless that busy is satisfying for me, it never feels good.what you must think of me on Shalavee.com

To be beautiful means to be yourself.

You don’t need to be accepted by others.

You need to accept yourself.
THICH NHAT HANH —

So this Christmas I gifted myself with the gift of no longer giving a shoot what anyone but me thinks. I can now trust myself to take care of my needs. My anxiety doesn’t run the show and so I am trusting in my decisions on my behalf for my happiness. Turns out happiness is the best everything.

And I’d like to think if it makes me happy, you’d be happy for me. Because what kind of world do I live in if I’m always frightened of the negative feelings I perceive everyone will have about me. Keep your mean to yourself and spread the nice. I hand out compliments because I love how they feel when I receive them. They’re candy to the soul. And everyone can use some soul candy every once in a while.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Purging the Stuff That Owns Us

The pruning, the watering, the dusting, and the ironing. If you have stuff, you need to upkeep it. Kids need food and clothes. Your body needs hair cuts and doctor’s appointments. Your house needs gutters and your car needs gas. If we listen to the mantra of American marketing, getting more while spending less is what we live for. But what if all our getting and spending doesn’t make us happy? If our lifestyles of ownership stresses us out? Then perhaps we need to take a look at what we own and why. Really look.

I do occasional forays into cleaning out my stuff. I have recently reached the middle of the Marie Kondo’s book The Life-changing Magic of Tidying Up. But I stopped. Partially because the holiday season hit. And partly because I know that there are deeper reasons for much of my ownership of my stuff that I have to plow through. And I may not be ready to go there yet.

Little by little I’ve touched drawer contents and desktop data. I’ve completely overhauled our internet and computer information saving/backup system. Very satisfying to not have to be irritated or concerned about any of that anymore. But there are a half-dozen boxes in the attic that contain objects from my childhood. They are stacked on top of each other, listing and falling about. And it seems an indication to me that I may need to repack up my childhood with some care. Purging the stuff that owns you on Shalavee.com

All the stuff I keep is to remind me of something. I suspect sometimes the items are breadcrumbs leading me back to a bit of unfinished business. My childhood has a lot of that. So when last night I dared to read further into Marie Kondo’s book, I was struck by the next batch of wisdom I read.

“By handling each sentimental item and deciding what to discard, you process your past. Or it becomes a burden and a hindrance from living now”.

“It is not our memories but the person we’ve become because of those past experiences that we should treasure. This is the lesson these keepsakes teach us when we sort them. The space in which we live should be for the person we are becoming now, not for the person we were in the past.”

So I will set aside some time and arm myself with new more respectable containers for my childhood. I will dig through, decipher, decide, and then ditch what no longer belongs to me. And I will repeat that process as I go through my files for tax season. And my garage junk in preparation for painting season. Layers of ownership need to be peeled off me for the new year to feel lighter and more hopeful. I need space for what makes me happier. And to let go of what no longer serves me. And Miss Kondo promises, “One of the magical effects of tidying is the confidence in your decision-making ability.” I think I could use a big boost to my decision-making confidence too.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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