Waiting For the Third Strike

The printer was acting funny. Disappearing ghost letters told me there was an issue. Another appliance dying perhaps. And that familiar question whispered in my head, “What else is going to go wrong?” I caught myself and chastised, you are always looking for the bad, remember ? How about tomorrow you collect good moments? And then tomorrow came and that’s today.

My morning started OK and then deteriorated. And after I yelled at Eamon for dropping the jumbo plastic peanut butter jar and cracking the lid off, I had that feeling again like the day was done and I was irreconcilably irritated. Remember only bad Mommies yell at their kids for spilled milk.Chessie and the printer on

After laying hands on the printer, I know it was a lost cause. Yes it was too noisy anyway but I just couldn’t help myself from thinking, the first of the three bad things has happened. What’s next?

I’m fretting about this art project I’ve taken on. Thinking that it would be good problem solving and skill building for me to create this painted floor cloth. And I am suddenly in a panic over the painting part. So off to the craft store I go to overcompensate for my fear by overspending on art supplies. floor cloth corner on

Fiona and I roll up to the check out counter at the art supply store and my credit card has expired. Of course. Strike two. And now my anxiety is starting to burble. I’m also laughing because I warned myself that I needed to be looking for blessings instead of disasters. And this wasn’t any bit as bad as that time with the driver’s license expiring. Nothing will ever compare to that “bad”.

Next, we head to the grocery store to get a few items and some cookies she’s now decided she must have. Headed home with her hand in the cookie box in the back seat, I’m thinking about what’s next when I realize, I never strapped her in. Jesus! So I took this opportunity to stop in Panera Bread for a Thai chicken salad (favorite) and a potty break and calm myself down.

Fiona falls asleep on the ride home but wakes up when I try to bring her inside. That may not count as strike three but I stopped off for the box wine on the way home in anticipation of more disaster. I’m feeling slightly better that I may at least have the supplies to do the art job I must do, although no time, and I’m anticipating a fight when we go for the real nap. Sigh. sky over corn fields

You heard that right? My brain went to that quicksand place where all anticipated bad happenings start rolling over each other and down into the bad hole ? That is called anxiety caused by a cognitive distortion. It is common. And I’m extremely aware of when I am choosing anxiety. So I said to myself, what’s dead is dead. (Daddy went and got a new printer in the next couple days.) Un-napped children act ridiculous but the very next day, the nap was two and a half hours long. And although the garage “paint studio” was stiflingly hot, the painting of the floor cloth went quicker and better than I expected because I stayed in process. It’s quite beautiful in fact.

Truly, there’s always enough time, there’s always enough creativity, and there’s always a way around the problems even if all of them hit at once. And there’s always something to laugh about instead. Anxiety doesn’t help and rarely wins life value points and I’m getting better and better about grabbing a hold of the anxiety and putting it in time out while I get on with my life. And usually your luck does even out in the end.

PS. New printer is installed and Fiona barfed all over the couch and I will be installing the decorations including floor cloth this week. Stay tuned.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Painted Floor Cloth Begins

I’d dreamed up the perfect design plan for a Summer Solstice event. Inspired by a sun mandala, I would create a painted floor cloth with a giant sun to symbolize and celebrate the Summer. I was excited about my design idea even though I vehemently claim that I am no painter.  I figured, as usual, I’d design my way around that. And now here I am, in the eleventh hour, knowing that I am going to have to paint and dreading this once distant project that is now due to be done.acrylic paints on

My fear got a hold of a bull horn in my head. I am feeling itchy to just have this project done. And I have sketched and thought and now spent money to get ready… to paint. I am well aware that ‘that which you deny, you’ll also have to embrace’, or something to that effect. This was the same situation as my computer and social media phobia. And now painting. floor cloth begins on

And so once again I say I’ll do my best and it probably won’t actually suck. And the fact that I have a dwindling amount of hands-free time between now and the event is really just me begging to get my stuff together and schedule some , if I need it, back-up. Late nights are dreadful but might be necessary. And I want to always remember that in the end, I am extremely pleased with whatever my results are because creativity isn’t about perfection or being the best. Creativity is about creating for the sake of it and then following through with the challenge. No matter what. And what better chance to get back to my humble creative roots than with a medium I am intimidated by. plate and paint on

Stay Tuned and follow along on Instagram and Facebook to see snippets of my progress.

Tend And Befriend

Although the explosion of internet usage over the past couple decades may be the cause of increased isolation for many, as I mentioned in my Backyard Friends post, women have intentionally created pockets of community all over the internet. And this propensity toward bonding is partly a phenomenon of our biological wiring. We women own major production rights to a bonding hormone called Oxytocin, otherwise known as the hug drug. This same chemical we produce when nursing our babies, is also secreted when we’re stressed out. We bond together which then lowers our stress.

Seems we self medicate with friendship.

Me and leah at the Walter's on

We calm ourselves and strengthen our relationships with others naturally. In her article, “There’s Nothing Like a Bit Of Oxytocin Between Friends, author Susanna Freymark wryly points out that, in a short amount of time, we ladies lay it all out for discussion, from medical treatments to hair styles, then process it and move on. Then we have good feelings and memories of those moments and the people we spent them with. “Someone cries, they are consoled and counseled with the interchange ending in bursts of laughter. Women rally round. It is the currency of their friendship — this support they give each other through minor and major crises in their lives. Friendship matters to women.

And it matters to their health.”

Me and MB for cinqo de mayo Tend and befriend on

According to a study done at UCLA in 2002, People who tend and befriend lead more joyful lives and suffer far less physical impairments.The difference in the recovery and grief time for women is decreased and may explain why women end up living longer lives. Ms. Freymark says the results of the findings “were so significant that not having close friends was deemed to be as harmful to your health as smoking or carrying extra weight. ” Cool and scary. Isolation is a killer.

When we women overcome the fight or flight response with production of Oxytocin, our instinct is to tend to our children and friendships which in turn reduces our stress. And if the children are the cause of our stress, we really need to bond even more with others who understand this and won’t judge us. Ironically, we become closer and feel better when we’re stressed due to how we deal with the stress.

Caitlin and Fiona on tend and befriend on

As Oxytocin’s been recognized for its amazing ability to significantly lessen depression symptoms, programs have been implemented which send a “friend” to meet and chat with people in need. Seems intuitive to know that companionship would help people’s psyches but to hug people and lend them you physical love, that is a truer gift of healing.

In this process of chemical and emotional bonding, we have reduced our stress and felt love for ourselves with someone else’s help. And we love them for helping us feel good. It’s a feel good-a -thon worth attempting.  That chemical love is healing and miraculous. And the memory of it will linger in your esteem long after your encounter ends.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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