Ignored Phrases

I was monkeying around on the computer, or most likely just hit the wrong key and fell upon some “data” that tickled me. I am a non-spelling and non-grammatically correct knowing and using somebody. I know you noticed and thanks for not saying anything. Spell check is an acquaintance I use when I have to. But there are plenty of times when I tell the spellchecker to F-off and add the word I’m using here to the internal dictionary. I really do get tired of having my name questioned every time I type it. And that’s the “data” I found.

I had discovered the list of the words that I had been annoyed with the computer for questioning and told it to add to my dictionary. I copied it and pasted it in a word document because I knew I’d never find it again. And I was correct. On an attempt to find it again just now, I was unsuccessful.

Somewhere in this hidden document was the title “Phrases to Avoid, Redundant Phrases, Passive Voice, Jargon, Hidden Verbs, Double Negatives, Diacritical Marks, Complex Phrases, Clichés, and Bias Language.” What would the world be without any of these I wonder? We need ‘bawdy’ and ‘rowdy’ and obnoxious type of grammar to add texture to our culture. I’m a shameless fragment user. Jargon and clichés are a mainstay in my every day communication.

And so I now present the official Ignored Phrases of my computer’s brain as commanded by me to pass through the gates.

“Identify words and phrases to ignore while proofreading your posts and pages”

Preggers

Shalavee
Shimmery
The definition of
at being
beatdown
beauticians
butt
concealer
hayrides
hoagie
holey
ladder
nookie
perfectionistic
placemats
potholders
provide
ready
sucky
the objectification of
thyme
un-perfectionistic
wanderlust and woulda

And PS, I just added ‘monkeying’ to my dictionary because, if I say it, I mean to say it the way I said it. Mostly. Unless it’s a typo. Because my 7 year-old can type better than me. Some writer I’m making. Just goes to prove, content should be queen. Because the mechanics are too mechanical.

Enough said. Check out your grammatical no-no’s and see what lurks in your psyche. Unless you too can’t find it. The experience is beyond Freudian. Now if I could only figure out why I dreamed about a two-story tall Abominable Snowman in my Mom’s backyard.