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Housewifery

 

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“Practicing the Art and Mystery of Housewifery”

We took a trip to Williamsburg, Virginia in the summer of 2012. Standing in the hot kitchen building where the cooking hearth fire had just been extinguished, the living historian explained the duties of the woman of this house in the 1700s. She oversaw all the domestic activities and practiced the art and mystery of housewifery. I asked him to repeat that. He repeated this and added, you didn’t want everyone to know all your secrets. I am, however, willing and glad to share mine here.

My definition of Housewifery encompasses mothering, housekeeping, gardening, and cooking. And includes decorating, diapering, and ridding my house of squirrels.

 

Click On These For The Stories

On ‘The Good Mother’

Or read ‘Mommy’s Thought Thoughts’

 On ‘Raising Fair Fiona’ 

Or read ‘Oopsie Daisy Mommy

 On ‘Son Shine’

Or read ‘Ready or Not, Here’s Mommy’

 On ‘My Joy of Cooking’

Or read ‘Beautiful Buttermilk’

On ‘How Does My Garden Grow’

Or read ‘My Brown Thumb’

On ‘To Clean or Not to Clean’

Or read ‘New Year’s Urge’

Opinions, Entitlement, and the Value of Your Voice

Posted by on Mar 29, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Raising Fair Fiona, The Good Mother, Used To Be | 0 comments

Opinions, Entitlement, and the Value of Your Voice

Opinions are like noses, we all have them. But are we entitled and allowed to have them? If I find it hard to find a voice to express them, I may not feel I’m allowed to have an opinion in the first place. As a woman, it can prove tough not to judge myself for what I have to say as necessary or valid as I’m considering actually saying it. Then I may choose to keep quiet. I have my own internal bouncer at the thought door checking the validity, wittiness, or profundity of my outgoing thoughts and opinions. And often, they’re...

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The Incomplete, the Ignored, and the Undone

Posted by on Mar 8, 2017 in Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Keeping House and Mind Alligned | 5 comments

The Incomplete, the Ignored, and the Undone

There is a lot of incomplete, ignored, and undone tasks hovering over my head. I come across a pile of stuff in my closet or attic or bookshelf and I think , I don’t have the time to deal with this. Then multiply this by 100 and I’m kinda a captive of all the uncompleted piles of stuff. A prisoner of my past, my intentions, and my stuff. Years of living reactively, of not completely cleaning up after myself, and of not knowing what to value has led to a slight hoarding problem. I get it honest from my family. I began my...

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Fiona’s Fourth Birthday Bash

Posted by on Mar 6, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Raising Fair Fiona, The Good Mother | 2 comments

Fiona’s Fourth Birthday Bash

Today was Fiona’s fourth birthday party and it was a complete success, by her standards and mine. Yes, she got enough Frozen themed party paraphernalia and stuff to satisfy all Frozen itches for a decade. And I got to bask in the knowledge that me and my daughter matter to all these lovely people. The reason I go to such efforts to decorate and to heap yummy food on my kitchen table is a tribute to the love that these people have for and show me and my family. My gratitude runs very deeply. I am almost speechless but then, not quite,...

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When Being at Home Can Happen Anywhere

Posted by on Feb 27, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Keeping House and Mind Alligned, Nest Feathers - Home Design, Visual Me | 2 comments

When Being at Home Can Happen Anywhere

My daily prayer is for a shift. Please let my mind shift to see me and my world and my potential differently today. To value what I have and what I know with respect and reverence. I leave the house hoping to break my “same brain”. And I do for a little while driving or shopping. And then I return home and I feel the inevitable slip back into my rut. In the light of the upcoming birthday party and having guests over, I am doing some home renovations. Throw a party and you’ll make progress. My hallway is getting a long overdue facelift....

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My Children are the Bully and the Terrorist

Posted by on Feb 18, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Housewifery, Raising Fair Fiona, Son Shine, The Good Mother | 2 comments

My Children are the Bully and the Terrorist

It’s conflicting to be a parent. They are of me but not mine. I need to be open and honest for them to trust me. But I need to keep a safe distance when they have to work out who they are because sometimes, that work is at my expense. Frankly, my children will bully me to get their needs met. They’ll be disrespectful but only to me. It’s business, not personal. They’re working themselves out and I’ve got the bruises to prove it. My son’s a bully when he wants more screen time or when he needs food because...

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Purging the Stuff That Owns Us

Posted by on Jan 20, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Housewifery, Keeping House and Mind Alligned | 5 comments

Purging the Stuff That Owns Us

The pruning, the watering, the dusting, and the ironing. If you have stuff, you need to upkeep it. Kids need food and clothes. Your body needs hair cuts and doctor’s appointments. Your house needs gutters and your car needs gas. If we listen to the mantra of American marketing, getting more while spending less is what we live for. But what if all our getting and spending doesn’t make us happy? If our lifestyles of ownership stresses us out? Then perhaps we need to take a look at what we own and why. Really look. I do occasional...

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A Warm Salad?

Posted by on Jan 13, 2017 in Daily Shalagh, My Joy of Cooking | 8 comments

A Warm Salad?

This is a republication of an old favorite from 2012. Hope you feel inspired to cook from it. I can always use some inspiration. I’d promised to pass along my recipe for a yummy warm salad with garbanzo beans (aka chick peas), orange zest, tomatoes, and salmon to my friend. Having pulled the recipe out of the box, it was last spotted with a pile of papers in the office area. That was about a week ago. I seem to have misplaced the recipe card. I have searched for it under my chair, inside my books, and even online but to no avail. And thinking...

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Parenting On the Edge of the Middle

Posted by on Jan 4, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Housewifery, The Good Mother | 4 comments

Parenting On the Edge of the Middle

My fellow Mom and I were standing there watching our children do laps at the Christmas train show. And I mused how it was hard to find that middle ground in between that place where everything your child does is all about you and that place where you’re completely disengaged. But to choose to stand on the ground in between. It’s hard to be there. If I make everything they do about me, as in making me happy, making me look bad, etc., then how can I expect them to not think everything and everyone doesn’t revolve around them....

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Industrious Over-focused is My Coping Mechanism

Posted by on Jan 2, 2017 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, Housewifery, Keeping House and Mind Alligned | 4 comments

Industrious Over-focused is My Coping Mechanism

I rocked my Christmas production. While Mark was out of the country on business in mid December, I scheduled all the Christmas activities on my two daycare days, at night, and on the weekends. In fact, by working more proactively this year, I event coordinated both Christmas and Thankgiving like a pro. And when it was over, when the pause between Christmas and New Year’s came, I awaited the twitchy tell-tale signs of my spastic over-doing nature to pull me off the couch. From my therapist, I learned that in childhood, when a child...

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Remember, They Are So Little

Posted by on Dec 28, 2016 in Ahas, Daily Shalagh, Gathering My Lessons, The Good Mother | 0 comments

Remember, They Are So Little

Remember, they’re still so little. When they’re big people, they won’t be little anymore. They say “The days can be long but the years are short”. I have to imagine them grown already to appreciate them more here while they sass me and argue with me. They are clever and funny, manipulative and innocent. I hold space for all these qualities in them that they find what’s right for them. I try to be a wise and patient parent. And then I snap, apologize for my humanity and move on. They are of me but not mine. I...

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