Housewifery
“Practicing the Art and Mystery of Housewifery”
We took a trip to Williamsburg, Virginia in the summer of 2012. Standing in the hot kitchen building where the cooking hearth fire had just been extinguished, the living historian explained the duties of the woman of this house in the 1700s. She oversaw all the domestic activities and practiced the art and mystery of housewifery. I asked him to repeat that. He repeated this and added, you didn’t want everyone to know all your secrets. I am, however, willing and glad to share mine here.
My definition of Housewifery encompasses mothering, housekeeping, gardening, and cooking. And includes decorating, diapering, and ridding my house of squirrels.
Click On These For The Stories
On ‘The Good Mother’
Or read ‘Mommy’s Thought Thoughts’
On ‘Raising Fair Fiona’
Or read ‘Oopsie Daisy Mommy
On ‘Son Shine’
Or read ‘Ready or Not, Here’s Mommy’
On ‘My Joy of Cooking’
Or read ‘Beautiful Buttermilk’
On ‘How Does My Garden Grow’
Or read ‘My Brown Thumb’
On ‘To Clean or Not to Clean’
Or read ‘New Year’s Urge’
What Do You Do All Day Mommy?
She asked me this question when we were waiting in the car rider drop-off line at school. What do I do all day? I told her that I was going to exercise and that when I get home I have to do household chores and writing. And then come back and pick her up at 2:30. That’s 5 ½ hours to do as much as I can. She said that sounded like a lot, bless her heart. Because my work does not compensate me, it may seem less worthy than someone earning a paycheck in a “real” job. But what I can tell you is that you couldn’t pay me enough for the...
read moreGrow Where You Are Planted
After nearly a year of feeling the pinch of our collective sequestering, l’ve come to understand my ultimate importance. I maintain my family and I care for myself. The normalcy and the creativity are my realms. We all need both of these to keep our sanity. To feel that everything’s Okay in our tiny world but to also express our uniqueness. To hear and feel ourselves getting in touch with our own inner voices. That is what grounds me. Keeps me. Spurns me onward. Because this isn’t about product. This beautiful life we have a...
read moreSelf-Care, the Next Phase
Self-care is a multi-layered endeavor. Brushing your teeth, taking pills, and exercising are all basic bodily care practices that when we are new mothers, seem to be more than we can manage. But eventually we get those done too. I have taken the past twenty years to really delve into taking care of my mental health. To this end, I’ve had a therapist I see regularly, I’ve scheduled procedures to take care of the aches and pains in my body that weren’t normal, and I finally asked for an anti-anxiety medicine prescription. I...
read moreEmerging from the New Year’s Lull
I am considering how to emerge from the “Lull”. I’ve been working on so much behind the scenes and in my head. Caught up in the doing and not the showing and telling. Coming to terms with, acknowledging, establishing, understanding, and claiming my inner and outer worlds. I always struggle with what is important enough or necessary enough to share. I would tell you anything but where to start? Where to put your attention and my energy? The answer is somewhere, anywhere. Because if you wait until you create the perfect online plan or...
read moreSharing Our Space and Our Lives
I had a birthday visit from my oldest today. She’s a surrogate daughter, an adopted sister soul to our family. And she spoke of feeling that need to have a nesting partner. That next chapter where you feel the need to share your space with someone and your DNA with the world. I have always been a nester. And there was no one worthy of doing this with me until I met my husband. I knew he’d value the fathering job as much as I honored the idea of mothering. But Boy Howdee, sharing constant space with these mooks for nearly a year...
read moreI Will Not Ask Your Permission to Parent You
As you may know, we now have an official teenager in our home. Not the 13-year-old wanna be teen. Not the emerging effort teen. We have the full out hormones are making me weird and mindless teen. And no matter what you say, there are certain things I will not accept as normal for a teen. This is a kid who was so good I used to say he needed a day where he had permission to just be bad all day. He was polite if not thoughtful. Sure Dad, yes Mom. And then, girlfriend, lockdown, and his demands to make his own decisions about his use of “his”...
read moreAn October ’20 Update
Let me catch you up dearest readers on what has blown up my life. If you follow me on social media, you’ll already know that I have been dealing with my mother’s fall and her subsequent hospital visit. But this story goes much much deeper for me as many mother stories do. I have been called back many any times in my life to take care of my mother. I’ve cleaned her house. I’ve euthanized her cats. Anything and everything to return to rescue her from herself. And I’ve carried a huge resentment around for it all. My...
read moreAh Do Do Do, Ah Da Da Da, S’all I Want to Say to You
Am I doing it right? I dunno. Am I doing it anyway, Yup! This week is filled with anticipation of Autumn and all the cleaning and doing projects that seem to accompany the break in hot weather. Home and garden maintenance and cleaning. The windows look horrid. The bought potted perennials need planting. Things need painting. The littlest child is returning to school on Thursday. Seems no one died from the virus this week in Maryland. She will be masked and I will be driving her to school. But it gives me some hope that this will all be a...
read morePlague Parenting
I’ve been with my kids perpetually since March. Which means I have been their sounding board, their punching bag, and their home base. To maintain our family’s equilibrium, and my sanity, I’ve had to get even craftier about my parenting. Buying them things sometimes brightens the mood. Restricting screen viewing works occasionally. But what I’ve found is very effective is installing a carrot that you can yank whenever they get used to the taste. Bwahahahahah! My son is just about driving age. So physically learning how...
read moreSeptember Has Arrived
September has arrived. The crickets forewarned me. The temperature dropped a delightful 15 degrees Fahrenheit although the humidity has kept its nasty reign on out region. I look forward to these things. To the schedule, rhythm, and routine of the school work week so I may advance with my own progress. To the planning, implementing, and shutting down of the garden workload. To bringing down the fuzzy rug and turning on the fireplace because it’s cold outside. To wearing clothing that covers the back of my thighs. To firepits in the...
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