Hear Me, See Me

As has become customary, New Years day found us at our friends’ house across the Bay in the “Dena”. A few no-shows but we all caught up and played with the children. Talk passed through the territory of Facebook and the posting of pictures. I told how I had posted a picture to someone’s wall and how someone had done this to me prior. There was flinching. We agreed it can be slightly disconcerting to have someone post a picture of yourself to your wall that you haven’t given prior approval to.

I made a statement which I’m now going to spin into a sort of New Year’s proclamation. When my friend jammed that picture up on my Facebook wall from her open house, I left it there. I’ve decided that I need a little humility in my life. We are all so self conscious about our images, our permanent reflections. Why must we go around eradicating our images and proof of our existence? Hell, I look as bad as everyone else. I proclaim no shame.

I will not go out of my way to be ashamed of how I look. I’m making myself buck-up and shut-up about the way I look in pictures. I am what I am. Meanwhile, I’ll make double the effort to lose the extra weight and when I do, there’ll be pictures to compare me to, won’t there? And in the new pictures, I’ll be wearing make-up because I’ve also decided that if I’m going to suffer with random pictures, I better look my best all the time. OK, maybe not to the grocery store or the gym, but anywhere else.

If I’m going to continue to blather on about my opinions on life and what makes me me, there should be a picture of me to go along with it. So my readership can decide if I’ve a face of a liar, a prophet, or a housefrau. The picture I’m using is one my six year old son took on Christmas morning. I seem to have equal parts resignation, sleepiness, and amusement in my expression. And I think that’s a face that suits me.