Gathering My Lessons
I am constantly learning from my life. Someone special to me said that I could glean a lesson even from a recipe.
Which is what I did in my post, When The Recipes Must Go.
I call them Ahas. I can also stand on a Soapbox every once in a while.
And I learn some pretty big stuff from some little people in my life. The good and the bad and
the happy and the sad. My friendships are very important to me. The past holds some wisdom yet to be learned.
And my husband’s lessons are occasionally shared by his voice here. I may repeat myself, but guaranteed,
I’ll get you to think about life just a little differently.
51% Belief Will Make it Happen
You will not do what you do not believe you can do. You can hope and wish for change but the spark for creating the change lies in your heart. What you believe is possible. What you believe isn’t won’t happen. You need a 51% belief factor to realize your dream. A knowledge of the future that you can will it so, that the Universe is rooting for you to do this. Otherwise, your lack of belief will only serve to sabotage you. If you find yourself saying “see, I knew it wouldn’t work out” remember this, you believed it into being...
read moreKIndness
Why is it we think that we assume other people will suck? That they’ll be mean to us if we ask them for a hand or a hot shot. Why are we so surprised when we are rewarded with humanity. I have recently noticed that when I present myself to the world with a glad and kind heart, a smile and a wave, and a little more confidence than I used to have, I am rewarded with the same. In fact, my kindness expands as I give it out. I touch them with the flame and they light up. Kindness is the gift that keeps on giving. It costs nothing yet it is...
read moreMy Fear Box Hides My Capabilities
Somehow I’ve decided that there is a box I am supposed to stay within. That to venture from the box is certain death. I somehow always know that I am not allowed to imagine myself anywhere else but in the Fear Box. I am denied access to the world of possibilities outside. But I also know that the key to freedom is in having self-esteem enough to fill my balloon and sail over the walls of the box and out into the world. Feeling capable is the updraft. Capability however is stolen by low self-esteem. Negative judgmental thoughts are the...
read moreCommunity is a Necessary Evil
I’ve just come away from organizing a successful fundraiser for my church community. Everyone showed up for the fundraiser bringing food and auction items and they enjoyed laughing and dancing within that community of people. This is the sort of experience that strengthens our individual selves as well as the community. Makes us feel wanted, needed, and gives us a sense of belonging. And then there’s those other moments as a part of a group. When someone says something that pisses you off. When you feel taken advantage of or...
read moreWhy is Being Less Anxious a Bad Thing?
For years, I suffered my anxieties. Eventually, I recognized them and set an intention to “cure” myself of them. I tried everything to make this happen. I am perpetually in therapy. I read a copious amount of material on understanding myself, self-love, meditation, and forgiveness. And nothing was truly doing the trick. A year ago when finally, in desperation, I wisely asked for my doctor to write me a prescription for some pharmaceutical relief from what finally felt like a living anxious hell, I found my way out. I had won and I had lost....
read morePumpkin Smashers
I was a city kid, savvy to the dangers of the incivility of civilization. I’ve had to field unwanted advance from local celebrities, fend off junkies and drunks on the public bus, and walk home at nighttime from work. But I don’t think I’ve ever felt more upset than when I had my jack o’ lantern smashed at Halloween when I was in my 30’s. Of course it was the neighborhood teenagers and I knew better than to have left it out. But it was then that I coined the phrase “pumpkin smashers” to describe...
read moreAre You a Noun or a Verb?
If I had to tell you what I would do when I grew up, I’d say “I’m going to be a Momma. I’m going to be an Artist. I’m going to be a Writer. And I’ll expect all of those things of myself that go along with being the best Momma Artist Writer that you think I can be. I mean I think I can be.” Who gets to decide if you are what you say you are? Are you legitimate only when someone says you are, gives you a certificate or a diploma or an award? Because if the answer is anyone other than you deeming you legitimate,...
read moreThe Invisible Duties of Mothers
I often have people remark that they see me doing a lot and they are impressed and/or shocked at how much I seem to get done. I wonder if they don’t recognize how much they accomplish too. And then recently it became clear that women often have many invisible life duties that add up to way more than an 8 hour day. I feel like we women are often dutiful and humble, we just see what we do as necessary and move on. Yet there are so many tasks without which life would be uncivil and unkept. Besides the homekeeping, laundry, and meal...
read moreDo You Belong to the Cult of Zen Okayness?
I had heard rumors about the Cult of Perfect on the internet. And although I have stayed away from much of the perfecty picture world, there is definitely a cult of Okayness that exists. Women posting about how zen their lives, clutching their cupfuls of okayness while they practice mindfulness and home school their children. While I aspire for the zen okayness, and no, homeschooling isn’t for me, I can’t help but sense that the perpetual claiming of this smacks of a Lady Macbeth flavored lack of achievement. If I keep claiming...
read moreAn Ode to the Women Who Have Shared Before Me
If you have been with me for a short time or a long, reading my stories of my journey and milestones towards increased self-esteem and awareness, you will know that this doesn’t happen in a vacuum. There are many people who have inspired me and encouraged me along the way. And it is this dynamic that I want to extoll today. Were it not for the many women out there who have simply, or at length, told their story, or even a part of their story, in a way that I discerned that there was more for me than where I was, I wouldn’t have moved. I had...
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