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Currently Browsing: Keeping House and Mind Aligned

Glam It Up

A 20 something girl got onto the elliptical next to me and I caught a whiff men’s cologne? Smells have a way of taking you to a third dimension, to memories and feelings that would not usually occupy your day. And now they do.

I realize that the memories of the showboating that were my 20’s, could be a bridge to making my 50’s a little more interesting. I just turned 53 and I’m finding my life a little blah. It’s midlife motherhood combined with the aches and pains of becoming old … and I’m bored with myself.

But the change may be a matter of little things like jazz music while we eat, a creativity podcast while I walk, or applying make-up for a day out that may kind of boost my reality. Sound and smells and dressing up seem to boost the normal. And I’m feeling a needed boost right now. Glam It Up on Shalavee.com

My twenty year-old self knew how to put on a show. She dressed up and found her inner somebody else and she flaunted that. Alot. My 53 year-old me would like to remember what it was like to make up me on a moments notice. To done costumes and feel like she was someone else just for a little while. I think giving myself permission to live creatively is the key.

Let me know how you stir up your daily with creativity? Do you play different music? Do you put on make-up? Or listen to a podcast?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Labor of Mom Love

My sister asked if I had any plans for the day. I said nah, I’m not doing anything. Just my regular stuff, no big deal. And she says, I would say you do a lot of stuff and a big deal. And I realize that I just belittled myself and all the hard work I put into my house that I do make it look clean and easy.

I am at the store with my son and he asks if this half a cart full of groceries is a regular size shop. I ask if he knows how many meals a week I am responsible for. 21 meals and that includes any that I have to pay for at his school via the computer. Multiply that by four people. But I just expect I must do this because that’s what I do.

I don’t think there’s any occupation that takes itself more for granted than motherhood. Mother’s Day Needs to be a week in which everyone else takes over the Mom’s job so they actually experience the ridiculousness of it.labor of Mom Love on Shalavee.com

But in the same breath, it is also up to us to wean and train our families to rely on us less. To show them the necessity of chores and hygiene to maintain self-respect. To encourage them to claim confidence in this adulting thing.

Labors of Love are always a given with me. But I also have scolded my children for taking advantage of my kindness and generosity. I model self-respect so that they may do the same to their children later.

So this is my Ode to Motherhood, the Labor of Love that we are guilty of taking for granted. May you enjoy lots of it in your life.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

What Do You Do All Day Mommy?

Fiona says she thinks I need to go and get a job. That way she can get to go to daycare after school and play with her friends longer. I told her I had a job. What do you do all day Mommy? I write and do all those things that take care of my family and keep the house in order. Yeah, that’s not a job.

This isn’t just words from a child’s mouth, I know many a male has wondered what we do with all of our “spare” time at home. Truth is that unless you’re a home keeper-upper, you have no idea the massive myriad of details there are to be taken care of. And I wouldn’t begin to defend myself with the details because my priorities may not be yours.What Do You Do All Day Mommy on Shalavee.com

What I can say is that keeping your family in 21 meals a week and clean clothing is a herculean undertaking itself. Add on the upkeep of a large nasty old house and grounds and your plate overflows. A dose of social and healthful obligations and then try to stick in time at your creative discipline and the cup runneth over.What Do You Do All Day Mommy on Shalavee.com

But I do do it. Plus balance the checkbook and pay the bills on time. Plus the cats’ upkeep. Plus the dental and doctors appointments… And we the women, the stay-at-home moms, could feel shame if we were to see ourselves as worthless through the eyes of the those who don’t understand our efforts.

And we will get no respect if we do not respect ourselves. And raise children without any self-respect too.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Mugged by Grief

My Sister was visiting recently and we were talking about lost earrings. How we end up with that single lonesome earring and we say, “ I can make a necklace out of it”. Except we don’t and we won’t and that earring just ends up sitting in that jewelry box waiting to mug us with bad energy when we open it up.

One of the methods that now famous house clearer Marie Kondo uses to make decisions on whether to keep an object or toss it is to ask if it brings you joy. I can tell you that when I see those single earrings laying in hiding for me, I just feel grief.

.Mugged by grief on Shalavee.com

So I decided that out of sight was out of mind and I plucked them out and tossed them. Alternately you could donate the bin of beads and single earrings to the local thrift store. Crafty people love that. The point is, getting rid of them saved me from repeating the negative emotions of the loss every time I saw the one remaining earring. Then there were the red vase shards I found while weeding the garden…

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Clearing Away the Clutter and Chaos

In the beginning of the year, I began the simplification and clearing out of my house yet again. A couple years back, I read Marie Kondo’s book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up . I adopted a few of her storing techniques but never went all through the house. In January,I start stripping my life of my past chaos and applying more of her techniques to embrace the magic.

I got new towels for Christmas so in January, I cleaned out my linen closet and the old ones went to the SPCA. The chaos of too much stuff is overwhelming. I begin to feel scattered and bad that I can’t find what I need. I’ve cleared closets, drawers, my craft room, Fiona’s toys, and the refrigerator.
I must say my inner Virgo is happy to see all that space.

So this weekend, under the auspices of continuing the renovation of our garage into a band practice space for our son, we cleared out the garage and basement. Our basement is unfinished and very dirty but we cleansed our souls of all our past endeavors and failures. I let go of everything which was like letting go of stories that no longer defined who I am.

Clearing Away the Clutter and Chaos on shalavee.com

Today we took the lot of it to a reuse it store. As they let us know several times they were being kind to take a lot of my stuff, I was feeling the grief around letting go. The few items that were more than “gently used”, I brought back home to await the next purge to the local thrift store opening this Friday. Yay a Goodwill in my town!

Letting go takes energy, both mental and physical. But once the decision is made it’s much easier. Can I use it right now? Does it serve me? Does it give me joy? Is it keeping from seeing the things that do serve me and give me joy? Mark refused to let go of the Coleman cooler that his family took on camping trips when he was. I have a tray of metal slide holders full of slides that I’m still sure will make a cool art installation, perhaps a mobile?

Sometimes we have to just wait for things to become obsolete before we can let them go. Sometimes we need to rend them from our spaces for our own good. But clutter has never proven to be good for mental clarity. And in fact, making decisions about our stuff in our lives actually increases our self-trust.

It’s Springtime, typically a time to clear, clean, and reassess our Feng Shui. I guarantee that if you are in need of a pick me up, decluttering is one of the first steps I would suggest to clear your mind and begin again.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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