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Currently Browsing: Raising Fair Fiona

The Invisible Duties of Mothers

I often have people remark that they see me doing a lot and they are impressed and/or shocked at how much I seem to get done. I wonder if they don’t recognize how much they accomplish too. And then recently it became clear that women often have many invisible life duties that add up to way more than an 8 hour day.

I feel like we women are often dutiful and humble, we just see what we do as necessary and move on. Yet there are so many tasks without which life would be uncivil and unkept. Besides the homekeeping, laundry, and meal cooking, I consider myself responsible for all knowledge and care of the children. Their whereabouts, transportation needs, playdates, extra curricular activities, and birthday party presents are mine to manage.The Invisible Duties of Mothers on Shalavee.com

Their bodies are ours to care for until they can do this themselves. Clean clothing that fits and is seasonally appropriate and dentist, eye, and doctor appointments all fall within my realm of responsibility. And when my daughter comes of age, it will be me to show her how to navigate the not so niceties of being a woman.

We do ourselves and our daughters a disfavor by not acknowledging our accomplishments. We become invisible and taken for granted. I have had it happen to me. I must say though that I do enjoy much of what I do for my family. I dearly enjoy being a homebody and a parent and use all opportunities to be creative and make it fun and memorable.

The weaving of the rewards is then up to us to place in the layers between our goals and our duties as mothers. And we also need to ask for the gratitude and acknowledgment we do not receive in a paycheck. We need to see our own value and herculean efforts and model self-worth for the young women we are raising who will perhaps take on a role like ours in heir futures.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Testing, Testing, is this Parent On ?

This first week of school is notoriously rough for our youngest. There are new teachers, new routines, and new buses to acquaint themselves with. And I fully expect our train to derail somewhere in the middle of back to school week. I was slightly mistaken in that there weren’t as many neurotic breakdowns and a crying fits. But the weekend brought me the brunt of the week with not so fab behavioral choices.

The tall one was seemingly good until we found he’d smuggled his phone up to his room for late night phone poking and gaming which is against my rules. He did not try to hide it. I am holding the phone every day this week after school. He conceded to this punishment without question.

The small one, she brings on the fits and the tantrums fast and furious these days. I felt like my weekend was usurped by these fits. Every time I turned around, she was mad about something (My theory that she’s happiest when she’s unhappy resurfaced). Last week, her constant lack of appreciation for gifts received got her a week long hold on asking for anything. So she’d say she would like something and then when I shut her down, she’s say, “Wishing’s not wanting Mom.” The heck it isn’t sassy pants.Testing, Testing, is this Parent On ? on Shalavee.com

I can barely contain my giddiness sometimes when I get her onto the bus in the morning. Because, for 7 hours, I’m not going to be used as a punching bag to find out where her boundaries stop and mine start. I understand the necessity of their pushing and my pushing back to show them they are loved and safe, but parenting is an exhausting gauntlet through their childhoods. A relentless journey into the irritable and seemingly unnecessary woods we’ve long since forgotten we’d navigated ourselves.

But navigate they must, testing us all the way, to find out how important and loved they are so they can take that in a to-go package to use for the rest of their lives. Just give me a few hours off each week please.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

My Key Lime Pie Recipe

After a few decades bringing food to potlucks, you develop your own go-tos to make. In the Summertime, my must bring is Key Lime pie. The recipe is ridiculously simple and the graham cracker pie crust tins make great carrying containers.

My key lime pie on Shalavee.com

Key Lime Pie

One premade graham cracker pie crust

4 egg yolks and one egg white

14 ounce can of sweetened condensed milk

¾ cup lime juice

Tub of Cool Whip topping

Kiwi fruit peeled and sliced

My key lime pie on Shalavee.com

The premade crust asks to be painted with egg whites

and precooked for 5 minutes at 375 degrees F.

Mix egg yolks, sweetened condensed milk, and lime juice

together and pour into crusts.

Cook for 15 minutes at 350 degrees F.

Chill in the refrigerator to set and then spread with whip cream

and decorate with slices of kiwis.

My key lime pie on Shalavee.com

The pie crusts come with plastic covers over them. I just invert the cover and recrimp the edges and off I go.

My salad go-to for potlucks is German Potato salad.

What do you bring for a Summer potluck?My key lime pie on Shalavee.com

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

 

Parenting Keeps Improving Me Despite Myself

There are days with these junior people that are trying as in, I’m trying not to be irritated or sarcastic because I’m tired and so are they apparently and nothing good can probably come of our interaction. Mornings when I can not wait until Fiona has gotten on the bus so I can sigh for the relief of no more drama to deal with. Nights when my son just won’t go to bed and leave me alone. Life is composed of day upon day and never is that more felt than in a parent’s life.

They ask you to rise with all the kindness and humanity you possess. All the humility, dignity, and patience you were sure you did not possess before you were a parent. Because a part of you gets born with them. A person who can no longer ignore your impact on the world’s footprint. A person who wants to model self-pride and self-acceptance. A better parent to yourself in the end and you know parenting is always do what I do, not just as I say.

Parenting Keeps Improving Me Despite Myself on Shalavee.com

You will also discover your limits and their limitless trust in the relationship you forge from the cosmic nothingness of childbirth. We can hope to give our children more than we had, make up for our childhoods with better ones for them.
But in the end, they love you no matter what you do with that forgiveness that you seldom afford yourself.

I am in awe and ever grateful for these gifts that keep on giving back to me, my children, the tall one and the small loud one. Eamon and Fiona are the most wonderful pieces of universal creativity I will ever have a hand in. And I am grateful on a daily basis for their ridiculous gift of my appreciation of my existence before they were here.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Keep Aware of Your Dreams

Last night I had a dream that I was being challenged by a short red-eyed robot girl who might have had red hair too. I topped that dream with a waitress dream. The one where I can’t put my waitressing uniform together or find a ticket book or a pen to take the orders.

Thankfully, I woke up after telling everyone to evacuate the area which was under attack by an army. But I now know the robot girl is Fiona. I am keenly aware of my subconscious today. How about you?





And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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