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Currently Browsing: Self-Discovery

Quietly Starting off 2020

I took a lot of lovely pictures during the Holidays but wasn’t compelled to share them. There’s a calm withdrawal from much of what I automatically have done. I want to find a deeper place to draw from. I am yearning for a profounder place of purpose. Authentically sharing what I know I need to and not because I think people will like me for it.

All of the changes I’ve made have come from my intuition. I watch people, I listen to what they say that makes sense to me, I incorporate the feeling and the thoughts, and I turn in the direction that makes more sense. Resetting my life’s compass is a combined effort of you and me, the reader in me and the writer in you and vice versa.Quietly Starting off 2020 on Shalavee.com

I also think that there can be way too much thinking going on in my brain. Waiting is fine but the best lessons come when we take a step in any direction and gauge what happens next. I have long meant to upgrade the blog site and many steps have been made and then halted. One big step I took in 2019 was to pick this up again. As terrifying as this is for me, and it truly is, I am also in need of being done stepping into a new skin, a new vehicle to inspire me and my readership.

So hold on to your hats, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride into the next phase of what Shalavee means to me and you.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Holidays without Anxieties Update

We’re in full holiday swing now and the mood is different than ever before. Because I’m different. Backstage at the Nutcracker night, I told the other mothers that I had been an ever-loving mess last year but I’m medicated this year. They laughed but this is my truth; I am a different person this year. And I owe that to making a life-changing decision to ask for medication for my anxieties.

Helping myself out of the perpetual swirling vortex of anxiety is allowing me to be present for myself, for my family, and also for others who can choose this for themselves. As my friend Siri on Instagram chimed in to say it better than I could have,

Holidays without Anxieties Update on shalavee.com

Fiona is all the way on the right

Best decision of 2019. Deciding to finally try meds for the depression I’ve battled for decades. It’s early days yet, and my doctor and I are still fiddling with dosages, but I already suspect that this could be, in the words of a friend, a game-changer. Why not sooner? Because it wasn’t “bad enough” – I was able to function wasn’t I? Because I was sure I could fix it without meds if I could just find the combination of lifestyle choices and cognitive-behavioural tools. Because stigma. Shout-out to Shalagh, whose openness encouraged me to try. Shout out to my wonderful husband and friends and family, who have been steadfast with their support as I start this new journey. Shout-out to me.”

Every change and every choice we make for ourselves has a snowball effect in our lives. When we choose to take better care of us, everyone benefits. And in my case, the holidays are more laid back and my hope is that my children will not inherit as much of the anxiety as we did from our parents. I am setting the scene and the tone for this very special time of year when my children deserve all the happiness promised them.

Happy Holidays to Everyone and I’ll be taking a hiatus from the blog to come back with surprises in the New Year!

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

The Gift of Me to Me

The holiday has been holding me hostage, as it does. Asking me to do be do be do be do all those Christmas chores that I find necessary. Buying presents, decorating the tree, sending cards, while all the while keeping up with the regular boring chores that I haven’t enough money to hire out. You know, life plus the Christmas special event planning.

And what I realize, as I missed one day of blogging for all of this, is that I am an everyday hero. I show up to the laptop and this community with honesty, integrity, and intention to be myself. And what more can we ask of ourselves? If we don’t do this, we don’t feel right. Misaligned, anxious, and untethered. The Gift of Me to Me on Shalavee.com

What is the most me I can be today? And this question needs to guide my days to come with such clarity that no one can push me off of my high horse. The gift of me to me, devotion to my joy and clarity is something I have awaited for a long time.

Thank you for accompanying me on this journey so far. The future is looking brighter than it has in a long long while.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Thoughts on Aging and Thankfulness

As I’m sitting about digesting this week, I’ve had a few thoughts and I thought to share them with you. Like, the fun part about getting older is that you begin to realize what makes you happy and what doesn’t. This corresponds with another realization that you are truly the primary person who you owe happiness to. And if you respect this and follow your heart, you can turn your whole life upside down.

I’ve discovered that hosting and serving others in a party or dinner sense is what I love to do and who I love to be while doing it. Such a sense of peace when I can set a tone and relax into the role of hostess. Thanksgiving this year was wonderful.

I’ve discovered that writing, conversing with, and supporting others is who I am and love myself while I’m doing it. I am hosting an Instagram Challenge currently and am loving it profoundly.Thoughts on Aging and Thankfulness on Shalavee.com

I’ve discovered that saying yes to anti-anxiety meds was one of the best choices outside of picking Mark to be my kids’ father. I enjoy my life so tremendously being their mother and knowing that I will stop the cycle of modeling anxious living.

However, I’ve yet to discover how to maintain bodily neutrality. Post Thanksgiving negative body thoughts want to creep over into the not so nice tone of voice. Instead, I am just going to schedule some exercise into my life and start keeping track of what goes in my face.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Why Does My Self-Interest Waver?

I am wondering what my deal is when it comes to my wavering self-interest. I understand that I prioritize my children and my family above myself. I understand that everything I may do that is a creative endeavor is a risk of showing my authentic self and getting whooped. Fear does a lot of dances around not showing up for yourself. And my bad opinion of egomania is well-established and substantiated which makes me not want to be that way.

Except, I’m a writer for goodness sake. I have to find what I think somewhat interesting to begin writing. And usually I find my way through to another set of thoughts I’m surprised by. But why don’t I find what I think interesting enough to promote, to delve into more deeply and publish? It’s like I’m two different people. The mild-mannered writer by night and then the American housewife by day. Hmmmmm…Why Does My Self-Interest Waver? on Shalavee.com

I have the potential to write really interesting pieces, in fact whenever I read my work I’m always surprised at how well spoken I am. But a general compulsion to have my thoughts on certain subjects known on a broader band, I’ve got nothing. As if I just turn a knob off for my existence. I don’t exist for myself, I exist for everyone and everywhere else.

I bring these thoughts to my therapist and to you. You are bearing witness to my process. I am inviting you here within my head in case you too have problems in the places I do. And I greatly appreciate your presence. But know this, I will break through. I always do.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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