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Faith is So Much More Than God Trust, It is Life Trust

Faith is a loaded word. It suggests dogma and suffering. But I feel Faith holds so much more meaning than a belief in a higher power. Faith peppers our every day. Doesn’t it take faith to get up in the morning and assume you’ll be alive at the end of the day?

Consider that you hand over your trust to every professional and company who manages your, well, everything. From their promises to never share your personal information to their promises your delivered groceries won’t melt, you have to trust. Whether it’s the guy you hired to install your water heater correctly or the babysitter you leave your precious munchkin with, there’s faith at work everywhere. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve had people blow my faith in mankind. Because humans are human.

We so naively act as if we have such control over everything. We haggle and oversee and manipulate like toddlers and yet we are oblivious how we are strangling our future. This unseen force called Faith could help us manifest a myriad of wonders if only we allowed it. If only we devoted our time instead to do whatever it took to make our lives happen happily.

I have faith that I have always been “worth it”. And I have faith that you are too.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

The Soul Plague of Unworthiness

I spent the best and most beautiful years of my life feeling unworthy. Unworthy of love, acceptance, abundance, and your like for me. In fact I was sort of suspicious of anyone who liked me. If I didn’t like me then what did you see in me? Or what did you want from me?

I know I Should Love Myself. In this world surprisingly glutted with anxious uncertain people, I believe low self-esteem is more of a norm than one would think. The Cult of Perfect is pervasive. And yet I am a vigilant amazonian fighter when it comes to my self-esteem. I deserve joy and happiness and I know that my esteem has absolutely everything to do with raising the happiness quotient.

Low Self-esteem is the soul plague of unworthiness because it robs us of our clear sight to see ourselves as the beautiful abundantly lucky people we are. We focus only at our lack and our not-enoughness. This is only exacerbated by a media-centric society that values people for wealth and thinness. The Soul Plague of Unworthiness on Shalavee.com

And this is how I fight the good fight every week to battle the low self-esteem. I go to the doctor. I ask for the support I need. I get medical and mental help. I share my authentic self every day. I put myself to creative challenges and make community online and in person. I exercise and am watching what I put in my face. I laugh a lot. And I write a lot.

What would it take you to respect you a little more today? To be your own hero? Are your anxieties running you off the happy highway of life too?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

The World Could Be Healed By a Weighty Blanket of Compassion

You’ve heard it over and over. The antidote to our toxic self-hatred and judgment is compassion. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We agree but somehow that doesn’t seem to fit with how we feel and treat ourselves on a daily basis. We count on our driving ourselves hard to make progress, to make money, and to make our lives worth it. Compassion is not productive.

I’m in my therapy appointment today and it occurs to me and my therapist that perhaps I am still judging my teen self for some things. And where I may have forgiven my parents or you for doing your substandard best, I may still be holding myself in a vice for some choices. And frankly, I don’t want to hold myself prisoner anymore. I want to be allowed to be human.The World Could Be Healed By a Weighty Blanket of Compassion on Shalavee.com

The one and ONLY way to counteract self-hate, and that oogy sub-human feeling we bathe in consistently and unconsciously, is self-compassion. Instead, we only gently need to say I am sorry that that happened. I know you must have been doing the very best you could. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you from that. That must have sucked. I forgive your humanity. I forgive you.

Try it sometime. Heap a weighty blanket of compassion on yourself and everyone. Break the spell and be what the world needs you to be, Human.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

I Can is About to Fuel the Rest of My Life

Somehow I’ve decided that there is a box I am supposed to stay within. That to venture from the box is certain death. I somehow always know that I am not allowed to imagine myself anywhere else but in the Fear Box. I am denied access to the world of possibilities outside.

But I also know that the key to freedom is in having self-esteem enough to fill my balloon and sail over the walls of the box and out into the world. Feeling capable is the updraft. Capability however is stolen by low self-esteem.

I have honored my creativity over and over yet I wouldn’t call myself an artist. I have written over 1000 blog posts and yet would not say I’m a “successful” writer. But I have successfully pulled of many special events and parties, decorated Christmas trees, and birthed and raised two beautiful children. I am a highly capable person who is completely unaware of her capabilities. Because Fear claims that knowing these capabilities would be unsafe.I Can is About to Fuel the Rest of My Life on Shalavee.com

Staying small and staying safe would be my Fear’s dream vacation. But to my intellect and my inner artist, this is soul death. Once you see that you are smarter than your fear, grateful for it having kept you safe of course, but done kowtowing to it’s every twitch, you end up in charge of your future. A bridge to a new place.

I Can is about to fuel the rest of my life. And I will work harder and be more forgiving than I have ever been towards myself if I can taste the freedom of I Can.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

I’m Too Much and Not Enough

I often catch myself thinking paradoxical “all or nothing thoughts”. Recently, I heard myself saying, “ I’m too much” and then I realized, I’m also “not enough”. How can I be both at the same time? Or do they neutralize one another? That is what I am now deciding.

Since I was small, I always felt too big. I have always been loud which makes people feel like shushing me. I understood that boys liked pretty girls, not brash girls. That children should be seen and no heard. I had such deep fears and passions, I felt the disapproval when I was bucking the status quo, thinking outside the box. And now I feel like I have been silently grieving the disparate gap between who I knew myself to be and who I tamped myself down to be.I'm Too Much and Not Enough on Shalavee.com

But there is also the part of me that thinks I am not enough. I am not savvy, smart, brave, driven, or thin enough. There is never enough time or money to truly have what I am. And my want will never be filled. Because I don’t want it enough.

I am searching and longing for the me in the middle who is exactly where she needs to be. Who can take up the space she already occupies and who is allowed, nay is destined to take up a bigger space in her world. A gal who neither to big or too small but just right.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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