search
top
Currently Browsing: Wisdom Lessons

Returning Inward After the Holidays

( Written days after Christmas ’19, it would seem this piece got away from me.. Yet I still feel the honor of the holiday purpose only a month gone. And I am in the process of picking up where I left off last year)

This year, the holidays were filled with more gratitude and family appreciation than they’ve been prior. We spent time together being us, laughing, eating, and loving. I wove this holiday with as much intention and family time spending forethought as I could handle. I threw my alone and writing time to the side so that all this could happen. And I do not regret one minute of it. And now I feel the shift to retutning inward.

And now as we wind down from the rush and worry of holiday tasks fulfilled, I feel the inevitable need to turn to the familiar work of my life. A need to return to myself and my creative work. A need to do some aerobic exercise and a few sit-ups. A need to re-channel my efforts inward instead of outward. And that feels scary.Returning Inward After the Holidays on Shalavee.com

It’s so easy to devote myself to my loved ones. My back might ache from standing in the kitchen for hours on end to cook meal after meal. I got dishpan hands from all the dishes washed. I wrote very few pages in my journal for wanting to be present while my sister visited. And I never felt resentful for any of it.

Now I must turn back in. To the voice that asks what’s the next lesson I need to learn. What calls me to be curious and what drives me to want to make changes to my life and the world. What’s squeaking that needs to be oiled. And I’ve got to do it like I mean it. Because as much as I find purpose in taking care of my family, I also need the balance of entertaining my own thoughts. Respecting that is tougher than it seems but it is where I need to head.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Finding a Way to Be the Most Me I Can Be

I’ve strayed off the path to myself. I’ve been an impostor for a long time. Maybe it began when I was a kid and I was told to be quieter and not draw attention to myself. Maybe that’s why I’m drawn to writing what I feel so honestly; so that I may rediscover my truer self. But I feel like the true destination is an ease within at being me that I have yet to feel completely.

Of course fear is to blame for keeping me in the dark. That “savior’ we hold in our breasts, that bestie for life. But what kind of friend keeps you from community and from your artwork ? Perhaps she will always be here but she needs to have a seat in the thinking chair every once in a while.Finding a Way to Be the Most Me I Can Be on Shalavee.com

Since asking for help and going on Lexipro, an anti-anxiety medication, I have had delicious thoughts of freedom. I am constantly considering how to be more me and what that looks like. The wheels are in motion for a re-engagement in my “work”, in what I do. Taking myself a little more serious perhaps with a little more challenge and a little more fun. I am always reticent to set goals feeling that perhaps I won’t be able to fulfill them and it’ll be a let down. But I know one thing about myself; once I set an intention publicly, there’s no going back.

Stay Tuned!

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Setting the Record Straight About Authenticity

Being authentic, honest, or forthright is still considered a crime in our modern society. It’s understood that if you tell the truth about your background, heritage, or state of mind, you are asking for trouble. You could be judged and shunned for these truths. It’s crazy-talk to be outright honest.

Many African Americans “passed” as white and were glad they could. Being “dishonest” saved lives. The Irish weren’t treated any better. If only they could lose their accents. And women would use a male pen name just to get theur work published. In order to survive, we have asked ourselves and our children to be inauthentic for the greater good. You never know when a posse with pitchforks from the cul de sac may come looking for you because of the truth you gave over on Facebook.

But the problem with this life tactic is that we and the children we are raising are so out of touch with our true selves, that we’re neurotic and sick. Inauthenticity is a prison from which you’ll spend the rest of your life looking for permission to escape from.Setting the Record Straight About Authenticity on Shalavee.com

I’ll give you permission. You may be yourself whenever you want. Not just in the shower but at your parents for dinner. And when you say something that shocks them, let them know that you can either tell them the truth or get brain cancer, it’s up to them. They’ll pick you telling the truth I promise.

Don’t worry about giving me permission, I’m already upsetting the world and my parents with the permission I’ve borrowed from other authentic inspirational people.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

I Refuse to Feel Ashamed

I spent all last year in an “unhappy with my body” place. I could not accept that I had gained back weight I had previously lost, even though I had given myself permission to eat with gleeful abandon for the Holidays prior. And so I struggled with my esteem, my exercise routine, and my eating and drinking all through the year. But mostly, I silently hated myself for no longer fitting into my clothing and having to buy a new wardrobe of leggings and over-sized shirts.

This year, I chose to give myself the same permission during the holidays to enjoy myself. And of course, I already had the stretchy wardrobe so whatever. And I knew I’d expanded that much more afterwards. However this year, based on my word “And”, I decided I was to give myself permission to be where I am and to work towards the change that I would be proud of.

Shame can be one feeling that keeps us stuck. We feel ashamed of our bodies, our socioeconomic class, our families, and our homes. We have images in our minds of how “normal” people should live and look and act and anything detouring from that image makes us fear disapproval and feel shame. But this is such crap. 

So I decided to take my burgeoning body to the gym in my too tight clothing and just not choose to feel ashamed. After all, I’m there right? I’m in the classes keeping up with everyone so therefore, why would I feel ashamed. And it’s my opinion that anyone that would wish me to feel shame is truly an unkind frightened person themselves. I bring a smile and a laugh to the classes and that is a blessing to all of us.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Mindmapping My Goals for 2020

I was feeling inevitably untethered in the first days of the New Year. I had produced an amazing heartfelt soulfulfilling holiday experience. And now it was time to pack it up and move on. I grieved for a little while and then I began to search for a way out. And what I found was a way to creatively look toward the new year: Mindmapping my upcoming year’s goals.

In my previous post A Little Post Christmas Blues , I said I’d show my work. Here’s the YouTube video that inspired me to do this. Her name is Taylor, she lives in Texas, and goes by Tattoedteacherplans on Instagram. She’s planner crazy apparently which I’m not but she’s doing what she loves!

 

 

I chose to skip whatever preliminary work she talks about. I was just stealing her format. But it was fun to listen to her discuss how she was thinking about her year and to watch the sped up film of her making the map.

My categories were Self/Health, Creative Play, Financial, Life Work/Career, and Spiritual. I listed those and took a couple days to fill in the ways in which I wanted to expand and grow in these areas. And the criteria was that I needed to feel good and hopeful and happy about everything I put on this map. Nothing that I felt I “should” do was going on there. And here’s the finished product.

Mindmapping my goals for 2020 on Shalavee.com

I was going to call this post “Nothing Changes on New Years Day (Unless You Want It To)” because honestly, that’s the truth. I get to decide what this year will feel like. I’m intuiting my life because doing what I think I should just messes me up. I am asking for help in the places I need it and will keep this map where I can see and stay on track with these intentions. I’ll keep you apprised as I tend them and grow with them. The goal is always to keep the doubts at bay and build the self-trust always.

Thank you for keeping an eye on me lovely people. Doing the best I can and am thinking that it’s pretty darn great!

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

 

« Previous Entries

top