search
top
Currently Browsing: Silly I Tell You

The Next Ten Things You Didn’t know About Me

So so serious. I am always feeling like I’m taking myself so seriously. So this Friday, I wanted to do a Soul Selfie of another sort. Secrets and stories. Who am I?

Whereas last time on my video lunchtime chat, I spoke about what it is to blog and why I do it, this time I want to talk about me, who and what I am.

Do that “Ten Things You Didn’t Know About Me” kinda thing. Off the top of my head:

  1. I have a ghost fear about swimming that I gave to my kid. So that I never empowered him to swim. I earned it honestly with several near drowning incidents as a kid. But this Summer was all about giving him the confidence to swim. And I succeeded!
  2. Fiona my second baby at 46 was a “spontaneous” conception. There was no fertility help. I just began to worry that I was going to have to throw a wake for my fertility soon and I hedged my bets. Had no idea that there were tests to take. I just willed her into being.
  3. I was past 40 before I started to write and publish my essays on-line. 45 when I started to blog. I’m a believer in Late Blooming.
  4. I was a DIY-aholic when we bought this house. For a whole year it was all I did. I redid every room in this house before I stopped when I had kids. Only their rooms were done since. And recently, I’ve been reminded that I love it so much, I may need to start it up again to fulfill that part of my creativity needs.10 Things you may not know about me on Shalavee.com
  5. It took me 6 1/2 years to matriculate from the University. I skipped my last year of the all girls high school I was in and went to college. There were boys there with fancy haircuts and suntans. I worked the entire time and took a semester off and one part-time semester. My very last semester had me needing one credit in any upper level course so I took poetry. I memorized a Wordsworth poem.
  6. In my other life, I’d be an interior designer. See number 4. Were I to go back to school, that would be it. Set design too. Ooh La La.
  7. I suck at roller skating and ice skating. I’m a very athletic person, good at any sport you put me to doing. Except those.
  8. I had orthroscopic surgery inside my left shoulder to remove extra bone almost 20 years ago. Only surgery ever. And a shot recently in my left SI joint (near hip) to reduce pain from a bone spur tells me there’s more orthroscopic surgery in my future. That was in February. I just finished paying that off.
  9. Which brings me to the biggest secret of the year. We are now are covered under the government health insurance. We make little enough to have the government subsidize our health. We were paying $550 a month and now we’re not starting last May. I had Fiona with the government’s help, thank you US GOV. And our children have always been covered by their health program, I’d just never had them run our income for us. This subject was one I touched on when Fiona was in my belly in this piece and gave me my very first taste of hate mail and troll comments on the blog. A bit of an eye-opener for the very sensitive pregnant lady.
  10. And because I need one more, Number Ten !!! I have written 850 posts, I’m about to turn 50, and I never really lost that ten pounds permanently. And it doesn’t make me a bad person !!!10 Things you may not know about me on Shalavee.com

If you have actually stuck around to read this last one, you are the lucky winner of my undying admiration and devotion. If you are on Facebook, take a moment to pop over to my Shalavee Facebook page and see my videotaped self in live to recorded action. Like the page, take a look at the other videos. Something. Wednesday is another post day. Talk at you then.

If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit. If you Sign up for my newsletter in the sign up box over there to the right, you’ll receive a first look-see at my Creative Mothers’ Manifesto! Heartfelt impassioned words on the need for expressing creativity for your soul and being a better mother for it.

In Your Face

I am large and she is small. While I tend to her needs these days, I am stooped down often sitting on a stool while I’m dressing, diapering, buckling, or scolding her. And I’m right in her line of fire. I am the sight-line, the moving target for her assault.

Toddlers are spastic. They get excited when they eat sugar, are cold, or have to pee. And when they’re excited, they are likely to mess with and shriek at whatever’s in their face. Which means me at bath time, me at diapering time (now done while she’s standing up out of respect), and me whenever I have to lean over to buckle her into the car seat. In Your Face on Shalavee.com

When we are face to face, apparently it’s an invitation to poke at me, shriek at me, cling to me, or whatever other action suits her mood. The other day she bit my butt as apparently my butt was right at her eye level. She’ll squeeze my cheeks (face), puts her hands down my shirt, and now has suddenly taken to assaulting me with kisses.

When you have children, you already give up your privacy while peeing. And considering the lack of privacy they have when they’re diapers are being changed, I guess turnabout is fair play. I remember when Eamon was about this age, he came home from his daycare and told us that the teachers had taught him about “persable space”. We still use that phrase. We still don’t truly respect it.In Your Face on Shalavee.com

So my thought is that soon Fiona is going to need the same talk about personal space and permission. Because however I ask her to respect my body will teach her to tell others to respect hers. While she is terribly cute, she’s also most annoying pointing her spastic attention cannon at me.

Until she says very sweetly “You’re a very good Mommy”. Where does she get this stuff?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

I’m In Waste Management and Sanitation Control

I often joke that I’m in waste management. On the kinder less disgusting side, I’m the recycleables schlepper, the playroom toy drawer cleaner outer, and the seasonal wardrobe sifter through-er. I have all say in what’s good and bad in the fridge and the pantry as I do all the cooking. And yes I’ll scold you if you don’t recycle that bottle.

On the less glamorous side,  I am also the diaper changer and the cat-box cleaner. I understand that in order to have beasties and babies to love, you have to tolerate and not complain about the circumstances that bring your nose to the direct vicinity of other beings’ poop. But I can also tell you that my patience with all of this is wearing thin these days.Valentine's Day roses on Shalavee.com

Seems Miss Fiona decided to take a hiatus from her potty “training” (aka regressed) after her third birthday. She will pee all day at daycare. She’ll perch her little butt on all public toilets including the ones at the library, YMCA, and grocery store. But when she comes homes, there’s something about she and I and our relationship that she’s reticent to let go of. It’s a Baby/Big Girl issue and it’s all hers.

In a classic case of projection, she’s constantly accusing her brother of calling her a baby. Except he doesn’t. So she’s stuck straddling the baby/toddler line trying to live the benefits of both. Until last night when I got mad because she peed on the rug right next to the potty while I was sitting there. And after she stopped crying from the swat on the bum, I believe she was relieved I’d drawn the line. They always want to know where that daggone line is. No piddling on Mommy’s Rug! Then last week? She pooed in the bathtub. Sigh.Fiona in the tub on Shalavee.com

And in the cat-box realm, we have that old outdoors cat who’s been rehabilitated and I’m trying to get her to use the cat box I want her to use. Except that means in the meantime I’ve had a cat box awkwardly stuck in the middle of everything and the other cats zealously tossing the litter every which way. Sigh. Twitch. Sigh. It’s a lot of hard work with multiple boxes and diaper pails and I commend anyone who has more than one bum to change within a day. I am doing the best I can but I can’t say I ever aspired to be a sanitation expert. That just came with the Mom job.

If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

My Grocery Shopping Fantasy : Being DONE

I declared sometime during Thanksgiving week, in the middle of the continuous trips to the grocery store for yet more nuts I thought I’d gotten and more butter and those trash bags I forgot to get, that I wanted to be Done with grocery shopping!

Wouldn’t it be fabulous if you could know that this shop was going to be your very last. You would never have to run to the store for the one thing you’d forgotten ever again. To never have to pretend to care about planning out the meals and stocking up the cupboard or getting everyone’s favorite this or that. To just be done the have tos of food hauling.Crackers and the bags from grocery shopping on Shalavee.com

I don’t mind the cooking too much. That’s creative. But everything else about the meal prep can feel very much like drudgery. Mostly I’m resigned to slog through until it’s over. I try not to think of the decades upon decades I’ll have to continue this task.

Because don’t even suggest that Mark does it. I sent him to the store for Stove Top and chocolate syrup. He gets two boxes of stuffing which I really didn’t want to eat anyway but he likes it. And he bought a name brand syrup when it needs to be just a store brand. He overspends when he goes. I’d rather have him drive me there, pack my bags, drive me home, hump the bags in, and unpack them with me. And that hasn’t happened in a really long time.Fiona grocery shopping on Shalavee.com

You know of course, I could feel the same way about doing the perpetual laundry. The Sisyphean nature of the never-ending laundry pile is maddening if you thought about it. And once I start the laundry, I have to go all the way. It gets folded right out of the dryer. I am a lousy folder but at least there’s no wrinkly blob shirts being worn.

Yes OK, maybe one day I’ll be able to afford to farm all the Cinderella work out. Hire people. A girl can dream. But for now, I am the best darn Cinderella this household’s got. I’m totally looking forward to little hands getting bigger to help and resigning myself that doing good job at all of this is noble. My family is important enough to me to want that for them. Providing endless opportunities for my indulged children to turn their noses up at a good meal I’ve prepared and wear the sweatshirt with the breakfast peanut butter on it to school.

If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

The Doing

The wash was still running as I took my tenth pee break of the day and contemplated how much time does all that I do really take. I hardly ever have a seat except in this situation. So what percentage of my life do I spend doing what? I would be surprised and flummoxed by what I guessed was my truth.

There’s the general household and familial obligation work including, but not limited to:

cooking, meal planning, and feeding

cleaning the house ie floors, surfaces, bathrooms, windows, and linens

laundry washing, folding, and putting away

physically attending to the children ie diapering, dressing, brushing and bathing, and disciplining

paying the bills and balancing the checkbook

grocery shopping and putting away the groceries

chauffeuring and errand running

snuggling with children,watching movies on Friday night, and fun activities

Messy closet on Shalavee.com

And then there’s the ‘me stuff’ which would include:

writing/journaling/blogging

exercising

appointments

showering and beautifying myself

reading blogs and emails

arting and creating

chatting with people, emails, and social media

picture taking and photo editing

sprucing and styling and decorating

Repasse on Shalavee.com

When I tried to guess how much I did weekly in every category, I discovered that apparently I’ve been squandering three whole days every week doing nothing. Either that or I don’t realize how much time I actually spend doing all of these things. Then I went back in and adjusted the times and I only ended up with 8 untethered unspoken-for hours. Truly, I think I didn’t account for the fun times.

How do you budget your time, manage your time squandering, and delegate stuff so you can get the better stuff done more? My friend Jane Barry says she does her creative work first no matter what. She says all the housework will get done eventually anyway and the rest of the day will be more happy because she know she spent time creating just for herself. I quite agree. Eat your colors on Shalavee.com

In her newsletter, my friend Sandra quoted singer Paul Simon in an interview with Alec Baldwin on his podcast as giving the same advice. You need to do your thing first. Do your work at the get go of the day and then, as time allows, check in on others, do your piddly stuff, and be distracted. But if you don’t do your work, when does it get done?

Trick for me is that there are some tasks that need uninterrupted out time. Like bigger writing and projects. And those most definitely can only happen on childcare days. What if I’m uninspired when those days come? Too bad because that’s all I get.

And from recent experience, even the boy (and the husband) can’t be present when I’m trying to work because he also just doesn’t know how to stop talking or thinking of himself. I found myself so irritated with him as I was trying to jam out some blog posts for this week that I had to banish him to his room or somewhere so that he couldn’t keep interrupting me.

What I’ve learned? That I’ve been desperately in need of this back to school time to get some of these bigger projects started. That apparently I really have no idea how much time I spend doing what I do. And I should really prioritize my art more than I do. Because when I create, my soul soars and I’m a way better and more creative parent as well. This time inventory was an interesting practice in self awareness.

Do you suspect you misuse your time? September is here now and there’s some big Fall cleaning in need of doing. What about y’all?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Page 1 of 1812345...10...Last »
top