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Currently Browsing: Keeping House and Mind Aligned

My Cup is Half Full

A cold rainy day has driven me to light the fire and my favorite smelly candle. My first cup of earl grey tea for the season has been brewed.

There’s a lull between holiday storms. Thanksgiving is only leftovers and memories and Christmas is still contained in lists. And I am maintaining a ‘be here now mindset’ as the calendar moves ever onward and may to try to hijack me and my anxieties with “all the things” to come.

Gratitude and appreciation keep us grounded. I am grateful that this old gas fireplace is still lighting after a dozen years in service. That I am still able to buy Paddywax’s Ralph Wald Emerson candle from their Library collection.My cup is half full on Shalavee.com

For the fact that we have money in savings for Christmas this year. And that family will visit to see Fiona in her première performance of the Nutcracker.

I have plenty of time to say what needs saying. And I have plenty of words to do that with. I m also infinitely grateful for all the eyes that take in my words and appreciate them.

My cup is half full only if I think it is. So today, I think it is.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Yes You Have Too Much To Do

Yes you have too much to do. Or should I say, I have too much I think I can do. The emails are piling up. There are stacks of unread magazines. There are outdated frozen soups in the freezer. And there are items in my closet that just don’t fit me well. There are dust bunnies with bad attitudes under our beds. And there were more important tasks than these looming in my future too.

As long as I’m still terrified of doing what I’m already putting off, then all those tasks get pushed back further because I have a priority hierarchy in my head. And when I added the yet to do list of tasks to get done before I went away on my trip or before the holiday event happens in my living room, I am drowning in my to do’s, Inundated with must do’s, and desperately wanting to be UN-inundated. Because vacations and holidays are supposed to be relaxing Damn it!yes you have to much to do on Shalavee.com

The trick to being UN-inundated is to actually do those things that you’ve put off. You need to take your fear and stare at it and tell it you will best it. Even beginning a dreaded tasks makes t less dreadful. It’s amazing how everything runs much more smoothly after that happens.

I did the hard things. Drove through the doubt storm. And I must say I was both pleased with myself and relieved and rattled by the fear which is my impostor syndrome stuff. But suddenly I was freed to get to cleaning out my closet and my freezer. I redecorated for Fall and am about to go dye my hair.

Yes, you will get it all done if you keep at it. Drops in the bucket fill the bucket up. But what of the sabotage by overwhelm? Attempting to take on too much is a great and mean way to get yourself to feel like a failure.

In my blog post The Evil Organizer Date Planner , I said this about my over-achieving ways,

I saw a driveway today doubled up with two rows of cars that looked like they were all in need of some sort of repair. And I realized that that’s my mental driveway. With that many tasks to do, it will never look like I’m succeeding even though I am. In fact the opposite may be true. The amount of accomplishments I do get done daily is staggering considering all that is on my plate. And I’m the only one who can’t see this.”yes you have to much to do on Shalavee.com

It’s one thing to say I really expect too much of myself, and it’s a complete change of lifestyle to actually weed away the overwhelm. And especially at Christmas when we’re all expected to be event planners, it’s easy to lose perspective on exactly how much we’re asking ourselves to do on top of all the rest of life’s necessary tasks. I have been a Superwoman all my life who never gave herself credit for the miraculous things I did. So this season, I’ve an eye on me to be mindful of what is enough and what is too much.

Did I mention we’re going out for Thanksgiving dinner?

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

To Be at Home at Home

My rather pregnant friend and I were having lunch last month, she was free of her two year-old and me of my five year-old, and the freedom of having lunch together outside of our houses made us giddy. And I said that sometimes I feel like I’m a different person outside my home. And she agreed she felt that way too.

It’s as if I am a prisoner of my house and all that’s wrong with it. The problems that are my problems to solve get topped by chores and meals and there’s no longer any room for me to breathe. Perhaps I drown in my own expectations of what it means to be a good homekeeper.To Be at Home at Home on Shalavee.com

And then when I escape, I’m no longer that person and possibilities of other ways to exist open up. The same walls containing the same lies fade away and I can make up new and better stories. And I wonder every time, how do I steal this feeling and bring it back home and redecorate with it? This sense of endlessness living. Of possibilities and promises?To Be at Home at Home on Shalavee.com

It is always in the way that we look at it that shades the daily feelings. I just find it interesting that both me and my friend experienced this same feeling of house arrest. I love my children and my house in many ways, I just wonder what perceptions I need to tweak to feel free and unfettered in my home again accepting that a little vacation is always necessary for a fresh perspective. To be at home in my own home, in my own skin would be a truly splendid gift. As I said in this post, The home I truly seek is within me.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Tidy isn’t the Same as Clean

Look around at my house and most of the time, it is tidy. I try to pick up after the mini tornado creators every day and a half. The feeling I have seeing no clutter beats the chaos I feel when I look around and see stuff everywhere. But there’s still the layer below that that niggles at me. The secret filth that I know is lurking everywhere that I will never conquer.Tidy isn't the same as clean on Shalavee.com

There’s the grease that flies around the kitchen because there’s no exhaust fan in there. It covers the back stairs and the fan and the top of the refrigerator. Eventually, I stab at it with degreaser but really there’s no winning that war. Until I get an exhaust fan.

There’s the scuffed up dirty wooden floors that need to be revamped and haven’t seen a good mopping in I can’t remember how long. Clean doesn’t comprise just vacuuming but when the floors look this bad, who cares.Tidy isn't the same as clean on Shalavee.com

There’s the layers of dust in hard places I can’t see that are too hard to reach. And the filth under the appliances that are too hard to move to care to get to. See, there’s an understanding that dirt is literally lurking everywhere and while I take a stab at scrubbing it off the windows every season and waxing my kitchen floor every month, there will never ever be a moment when I am alive that this house will be clean.Tidy isn't the same as clean on Shalavee.com

So I settle for tidy. And hope no one with white gloves comes for a visit.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter orPinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

My Empty Box Method

When I had to shut my business down (See the post about Bally Eden) and bring the contents of my shop home, all my stuff ended up in boxes piled to the ceiling of the garage. I advertised a yard sale and set to work sorting through my stuff. And what I realized yet again, was that your plan needs an empty box or space to sort into. When you have one foot nailed to the ground, it’s an sign that you may need to open up a new space to sort and move you and your thoughts into. So I cleared a corner and placed empty boxes there and began.

I am moving into a different space of possibilities. Like an empty box I put there in my brain so that I could move my thoughts on and sort them into. The shift was from impossibility to probability. And the room opened up. There’s more room to work with. There’s comfortable spots to have a seat with myself and intuit my next step.My Empty Box Method on Shalavee.com

When I have an auto-fearful thought, I challenge its validity, I write it out in my journal, I call a friend, and I engage in compassion and creativity hard to not let that thought become the thought/feeling/action triangle that shuts me down.

When I see that I am drowning in too many possibilities and too many options, I am taking time to sort through and put aside what I can’t do now. And question what I think I should do as opposed to what I want to do. And I’m packing this stuff away in boxes. Because sometimes just letting something sit for a while and returning to it later can provide enough perspective to know exactly what to do with it.

If you enjoyed what you read, please subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your email box. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional In-touchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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