Currently Browsing: Friendship
May 15, 2013
As you may know, men shop differently than women. If you’ve got a plan of shopping action, he’s willing to here it and execute it. But there’ll be no lollygagging and meandering about aimlessly for items.
The first Christmas season we spent together, we went to the Towson (Maryland) Mall and went separate ways to shop. And when we met back up at the appointed place, Mark was pale and shaky. Seems he’d been traumatized previously by shopping. Maybe he was hypoglycemic too, who knows.
So it’s been many of years of shopping therapy. The last time we went out, he knew his size and style of preferred jeans and his tailored shirt numbers so well that there was no fuss. I was astounded that we didn’t have to try on anything else.
And this week he surprised me with, “Let’s go shopping”. And we did and again there was no drama. We teased each other and strolled the baby around the store and then we were done. $300 in Kohl’s got us 5 shirts, 2 jeans, 2 shorts, and 2 pr of shoes. And when I came upstairs the next morning, He’d laid out his clothes out so nicely on the bed. Had to take the picture.
The second pair of shoes were on his feet. I thought about taking a picture of the ones he finally was allowing me to replace. But your eyes would burn to see them they’re that hideous.
And now I really need to get myself some new or even gently used clothing that don’t have spots or pregnancy panels on them. I suspect that the reason I no longer have anything this size is because I let go of those when I lost that weight last Spring. My ever changing wardrobe lamentation posts are here and here.
If you’ve got a good Mars vs. Venus shopping story, do tell.
Apr 25, 2013
Here on the Eastern Shore of Maryland, when we say we’re going over the bridge, it usually means a 45 minute drive west over the Chesapeake Bay Bridge into Annapolis, MD and destinations beyond. A grand adventure since the big cities beyond, Baltimore or Wash DC, are way more exciting than out little rural town of Denton.
But when I said to my husband, “I’m going over the bridge for lunch” last Thursday, I meant I was strolling over our town’s bridge over the Choptank River to the West side to lunch with the lovely Christina.
She works for the Caroline County Office of Tourism which is on the water on River Landing Road in a restored waterfront warehouse called the Choptank River Heritage Center. That darkness above me is the bridge.
And so over the river I strolled with Fiona on a lovely spring day.
We sat inside the center at a table clad in a happy blue tablecloth that Christina had set for our lunch of grilled chicken, a green salad with Gorgonzola cheese, and a orzo salad. And we enjoyed the view of the boats going by.
I was so lucky to have my special waterside picnic lunch prepared by this beautiful lady who held my baby and spoke to her so sweetly.
And then we rolled back over the bridge and I marveled at all the little spring weed flowers, flowering trees, and finale-ing forsythia.
I send my utmost gratitude to Ms. Christina who is soon enough to be a Mrs..
PS. And I’ve got my eyes on that Heritage Center to use for some special events. I know a guy who can fabulously light an evening cocktail soiree on the water.
Apr 19, 2013
If you know us, you know Butthead. He’s the cat who went missing for a week in Easton.My son’s brother cat. In a sad and really sudden turn of events, our beloved Butthead has departed from our company. As in, he had something heinous cancery wrong with him and his lungs began to fill with fluid.
Last Friday, I hauled him and Fiona to the vet’s where she extracted 250 ml of fluid from his lungs (he was drowning). The cells confirmed he had cancer in the glands around the heart. The vet said take him home and let his little boy say goodbye to him. A shot of lasix (Furosemide) to keep his lungs clear and off we go.
A couple of mornings later, we said our goodbyes. The boy cries. I call to make an appointment for his imminent demise and Becky the vet assist says, “You know we can give him a pill if he’s doing this well 4 days later.” Huh. So I get the pills. And stuff it down his throat. Twice a day. For two days.
I was having a hard time with the now he’s gone, now he isn’t, tomorrow’s the day. I asked Mark to reframe this for me. Mark said, “Think of him as being in Hospice“. The decision for his destiny has already been made by a higher power. We’re administering to his comfort and our feelings around that decision.
Sometimes, in sudden circumstances, we may need a few days to cope with the imminent concept of loss. My kid’s done with his grief. He was surprised to see Butthead when he got home this week. The reason I really wanted to keep the cat around a few extra days? It’s Eamon’s 8th birthday this weekend. We lost our Minnie kitty on his birthday last year.
So this morning, although Butthead was looking better, he was holding his front leg out at a weird angle. It seems, when there is liquid in their lungs, they will move their limb to breath. And Mark and I knew we had to take him to the vet and say our goodbyes.
So here’s to the Butthead. He was aptly named for his annoying dunderhead personality as a teenager. And we gladly enjoyed his company however he offered it. In the bathroom, in the middle of the kitchen floor during supper making time, or sitting out on the wall looking out over the river with his little boy.
Apr 7, 2013
My problem is that I never liked a popularity contest. I wasn’t popular nor did I care to be. I find it hard to care whether anyone “likes” me. Jimmy Crack Corn. I’m stubborn and figure, either you like me and you get me or you don’t. And this little attitude would be fine if the social media was about just being in touch friends and acquaintances.
But this attitude is not amassing me likes on my Shalavee Facebook page or upping my analytics or getting me more readership. Yet the social media statistics legitimize your on line existence. Surely the social media mavens would cluck their tongues at my flippant attitude. I want to believe that my authentic voice and my honest content should matter more than my SEO.
My fellow blogger / bloggess Sandra at Rainforest Cottage, wrote a post here on The Pursuit of Like. Her priority is the creativity. I suddenly felt humbled. Getting caught up in numbers takes you away from the reason to blog in the first place.
She commented ,“It’s not the pursuit of “likes” that’s a problem but rather the blurring of objectives as a creative who also blogs. The strategies needed to improve your art-making can be at cross purposes with growing your blog audience. If you do end up blurring the two, suddenly your art-making becomes more about recognition by others rather than about your own creative objectives.”
She’s translated this equation in terms of creativity. Because this blogging endeavor really is about inspiring a platform for creativity. The opposite of the divine spirit of creativity is the screaming internal three-year old wanting to be paid attention to. And I get the feeling that is what the society has morphed into online. Like me, friend me, and pay attention to me NOW.
My journey then is to find and feel some sort of entitlement around asking for your support without feeling like a beggar or a bossy three year old. There’s a way. And it stems from what my readers value and get the most from. The puzzle is :
What am I to my readership? vs.
What I think you want me to be? vs.
What I think I should be?
Opinions, if kind, are most welcome.
And I may have to do a survey, Ackk.
Apr 5, 2013
We found ourselves headed up to the Pub last Tuesday for half price burger night. We’d also gone the week before with the baby, even though my ankle was still really swollen.
Fiona must like the din of the pub noise because she slept through dinner again. So nice. And Eamon got time to play foozeball with the pub owner’s daughters.
All bellying up to the bar to get quarters for a couple more games.
My friend Jane in Ireland posted a St. Patrick’s Day post on her blog, That Curious Love of Green, where they were hanging out at the pub with the kids eating crisps and drinking minerals. Chips and soda water.
And I was reminded of the time Mark and I went to Ireland. We spent our first two nights in Dublin and were wandering the town in search of a sandwich and a beer. We found ourselves on the other side of the river in a pub.
The barkeep was the kindest man. After he brought us the most divine potato soup and ham sandwiches on slightly and wonderfully stale bread, we watched him as he escorted an elderly gentleman from the door to the bar. And waited on a couple as their children played with straws and napkins.
We weren’t parents yet and thought taking the children to the pub was kinda sad. But as parents, and having a local pub where everyone knows one another, it is a given. And I am amused by the way life shows you your priorities. Get out. Enjoy your community, your children, a change of venue, and a half price burger. And a pint of black and tan.