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Currently Browsing: Creative Soul Living

Permission to Be Me

It is truly hard to claim yourself. What do you like and who do you believe yourself to be are two of an intricate network of questions for which the answers represent you. Except we are so inundated with facts on who we are supposed to be a that by the time we are old enough to have the power to define ourselves, we’ve all but forgotten who we are.

“You can be anything you want to be” is such a ridiculous statement, we think. I’m supposed to be all these other things.

I keep thinking that I need focus on who I see myself as. To actively engage in a process where I define myself to me and the world. For years, I have had the intention of delving into my journals and blog posts to get to know and appreciate myself better. Am I doing that? Not.

Except, self-love is giving yourself permission to be you. And if you don’t know you, how do you know where you end and others begin? Or what makes you happy? Or what you’re good at? All your decisions are driven by the answers to these questions. Or they’re not. And you’ll feel lost if you are choosing life choices based on other people’s expectations of you.

permission to be me on Shalavee.com

So I am again setting myself to seeing myself in my writing by reading my words. I want to hear what excites me again. I want to know what my priorities. Like an archaeological expedition, I want to rediscover myself and find out what parts of that need to be fleshed out. What flames need to be fanned into a bonfire that I can tend and share. Thinking that my daily art effort will now be redirected to this project and we’ll see where it takes me.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

My Garden Party Looked Like This

As you may, or may not, remember, I overhauled my garden this Spring. It took me many days and weeding out over 30 wheelbarrows of weeds before I won my garden from those weeds.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

I had given up on the garden and my power over it. I kept saying I couldn’t possibly… And then I decided to change that to I could and I would as weather permitted. And I began because there’s no finishing until there’s a beginning. One nice day at a time.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

I am far from done but I have taken my garden back to ground zero. And that was an occasion worth celebrating. I chose June 30th (’19) as the date to host a Garden party. And our ladies gathering group eagerly said yes. But as we got closer, I knew the weather was going to be ridiculously hot. So I decided our party location would be the newly cooled garage instead.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

Remember, my husband has an event lighting company, On You Mark Lighting Design and Equipment, LLC . I know what toys I have at my disposal to play with and chose a chandelier and Fete lights. I cleaned out the garage further an reused an old table and a 4 x 8 board for our table. Bought a wickedly discounted tablecloth at Kohl’s and gathered all my linens and props and began to play.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

I ordered flower bunches from my florist and gathered Queen Anne’s lace and made one big arrangement and filled enough canning jars with bouquets for everyone to take one home.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

The menu was a Vietnamese noodle salad, a Rose sangria, cucumber limemade, and a key lime pie. Everyone brought wine and a few appetizers and other deserts and we happily spent hours talking, eating, drinking, and strolling the garden.

My Garden Party Looked Like This on Shalavee.com

I love seeing people feel special when they are at a party. To feel privileged and pampered is a wonderful feeling and that’s what I aim to achieve with every party I throw. Plus my garage and my garden have never looked so great! Plus I get the depth of conversation I crave. We celebrate people’s successes and we listen to their concerns. The validation of our humanness is worth all of the effort we can make.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

A Summer Morning Walk in Denton

Missed posting this morning bright and early because the Garden Party happened. I took a long walk as the weather had broken and other than the fact that my feet hurt, it was a glorious walk.

a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com
a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com
a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com
a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com

All the cottages in town looked proud and festive. The dappling of the Summer light through the trees was so enticing. And in the cacophony of cicada and cricket song from the trees to the meadow, I heard the lullaby of lazy days to come.

a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com
a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com
Crabapple tree
a summer morning walk in Denton on Shalavee.com

I owe you a garden and garden party post and now that I have time to do that, I’ll do that.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

Courting Myself and Remembering My Parts

Yesterday and Today, I did what I said I was going to do. I attended three classes so far in an effort to take all of the classes I can in a week. This is part of a bigger plan to turn back the clock to the point before I felt fat and old and scared. My coping mechanisms to drink more wine isn’t working. And essentially, my son told me calling myself old was getting old.

As I was in the exrcise class feeling my knees scream doing squats, I remembered that I had made a declaration some months ago before school let out. My intention was to channel my fittest 35 year old self and to partner her with my 20 something who pampered her beautiful self. These are parts of me that I remember and kinda like so it oughtn’t be as hard to incorporate them as it was when I had to heal my inner creative child. And I have considered my rebellious inner teen has a purpose as well.

Courting Myself and Remembering My Parts on Shalavee.com

And I remembered thinking yesterday, what would I do if I was courting myself ? Creating self-love needs to go both ways. It needs to be about feeling loving toward yourself but also about creating the actions that feel self-loving. Giving myself accomplishments to be proud of. Like my 100 Day Project for 2019. And yes, pampering yourself with pedicures but also taking you to the doctor to have that pain looked at. And going to the gym to create positive changes in your routine and body.

Love is about respect not bullying. It’s a conscious effort to make the other person feel seen and taken care of and safe. So this is me holding that conscious and compassionate space for my inner daughter plus her older inner sisters. And hoping to let the inner old lady have a seat somewhere to knit and pet her cats.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

A Bump in My Summer Road

I need to share a little bump in my road that happened at the end of the school year that I had to recover from. On top of having all the end of year concerts and recitals and parties, a mix-up at the pharmacy led to an unintentional cold turkey off of my new anxiety meds. This was something my doctor said Do Not Do.

A bump in my Summer Road on Shalavee.com

When I became weepy and had a constant stomach ache, I knew something was wrong. I’d been taking the wrong prescription and since I never have my contacts in yet when I take my medicines, it was a while before it got straightened out.

This was the first year that I went on vacation and didn’t feel all whacked out from anxieties while I packed, traveled, and stayed at our Ocean City, Maryland getaway. We all had fun and relaxed. And that’s what a vacation is supposed to be about. Whoda Thunk?

A bump in my Summer Road on Shalavee.com

These are the concepts I’m coming back to this week and today that are grounding me and guiding me toward a better Summer.

*Self-compassion is the best tool to get you out of a self-judgment loop in your head.

*Be grateful and show your gratitude for friends, food, and lodgings. These are well earned privileges.

*Use what you have and let go of what no longer serves you.

*Be completely present for the people in your life. Tell them the truth.

A bump in my Summer Road on Shalavee.com

*Show up for yourself. Give yourself opportunities to be proud of you.

*Give your wisdom away.

*Get outside as much as possible.

*Seek help for anything that you need.

*Create everyday.

Worked hard in the garden finishing up for the small Garden Party gathering I’m having next Sunday. The unveiling of my commitment to take back the disaster area that was my garden. I’m always at my best and most productive when I have guests coming and a party to prepare for.

And If you enjoyed what you read, subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my thrice weekly posts via your emailbox. And visit me on Instagram to see my daily pictures, friend me or like my page on Facebook. Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too. I am always practicing Intentional Intouchness so chat at me please. I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

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