Walking into my house today, I acknowledged that there is no anxiety here today. I am enjoying the time I’ve myself today and most days, to be off. Off of the addiction to the emotional roller-coaster that anxiety addiction was. And off from those auto-fear thoughts that caused them. Feeling fear-free and wondering, are there acceptable fears?
Don’t get me wrong, a couple of weeks ago I had some sort of doubt storm that I knew was some old script being challenged. And I know when I feel that familiar feeling of unwellness, fear is present. In fact if you give me any scenario of unrest, I can tell you fear’s at the bottom of it.
Which brought me to a question. Is there an acceptable fear? Yes, I think natural fears of shark attacks, charging bears, or being untethered at a great height are acceptable fears. They will certainly keep you more alive and capable of continuing your bloodline on this earth. But fear of failure? Not really.
It’s just that our brains are wired in this weird way that starts with the primitive and works its way out. So the fear brain gets to be in charge until we out-think it. So here’s to out-thinking it this week. When you get jealous or timid or have a day of the doldrums, I would like you to ask yourself “Why” five times. Ask of yourself five times “Why it is that don’t feel quite right” and see if you don’t come up with a “Because I’m afraid of” somewhere in there. And then write it down.
My hope is that when we uncover our fears, strip them naked on a page, and then hand them to someone, they will begin to dissipate. That their acceptability will wane. And we will find that our happiness, our needs, and our humanity would like us to continue to do the things that make us happy. Yes please and no thank you fear, you’re a party pooper.
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2 Comments
I want to be mostly fearless. Thank you!
I want to see Fear for what it is, thank it, and tell it to have a seat while I keep doing what I know feels like purposeful self-care. I just wish it weren’t so high maintenance.