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What Do You Do All Day Mommy?

She asked me this question when we were waiting in the car rider drop-off line at school. What do I do all day? I told her that I was going to exercise and that when I get home I have to do household chores and writing. And then come back and pick her up at 2:30. That’s 5 ½ hours to do as much as I can. She said that sounded like a lot, bless her heart.

Because my work does not compensate me, it may seem less worthy than someone earning a paycheck in a “real” job. But what I can tell you is that you couldn’t pay me enough for the work I do. The abuse I take from that same near 8 year-old exhausts me. Hauling laundry, cat litter, and recycling up and down stairs isn’t very glamorous. I went into uncompensated waste management.

It saddens me that we stay at home Moms are still looking at ourselves as “less than”people. As if what we do is a default job because we weren’t good enough for anything else. But this is a very patriarchal view because this job is the backbone of every country. I’d say men pee their pants if they experienced the distress we are under to which they often add to with their own needs. Unless these same men didn’t want or help to create those children, we’re in it 50/50 for keeping them safe and cared for. Money earning isn’t the most important job.

It saddens me even more that women would be so quick to disregard themselves and not ask for the respect and honor for this job of keeping the seams of the country stitched together. The future of our country is the toddler in diapers and the angry teen. Refusing to acknowledge that families need special care and love dooms our next generation to their entitled anger for emotional abandonment. I will fight with and for my children by showing up for them until they can fly by themselves. And I’ll ask for their respect in return.

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The Start of the 100 Day Project 2021 : Days 1 through 20

I started 2021’s 100 Day Project on January 31st. I assume they moved it up from its usual April starting date because, well, there’s nothing better to do this second year of pandemic plague lockdown. And most of us truly need to have a reason to create every day to offer us some relief from our anxieties.

This is my 4th 100 Day Project. Two years ago, I found the magic of this challenge when I recreated objects in my house using pencil and pastels. This year I am recreating views from with my house using watercolor pencils. I found my rhythm and talent then and I’m searching for it currently in this different medium. And what I also gained from this perpetual daily project was a self-trust and meditative practice that brought joy to my heart.

I am currently working on a way for the world to share in the joy of the art and discoveries of that and this projects so that they may open their hearts to an understanding of their own creativity that goes further than just showing up whenever the mood strikes.

Meanwhile, here are the first 20 pieces I’ve created thus far for #100daysofShalagh and #the100dayproject2021 .

Interested in reading my future ponderings on Creative Soul Living? Subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my weekly posts via your emailbox.

Find me on Instagram to see my daily pictures,

friend me or like my page on Facebook.

Or come find me on Twitter or Pinterest too.

I am a community kinda person and am always practicing Intentional Intouchness.

I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

How Do We Begin to Consider Ourselves Heroes ?

I was doing the dishes this morning and it struck me that any woman that gives herself credit for her thoughts and talents is my hero. I have struggled for so long with not only figuring out what I think, but then owning those thoughts out loud. The weight of knowing yourself in and of itself, seems so heavy.

Perfectionism is just another form of the fear of being seen. My daughter is currently experiencing this with math. She’s exclaiming her lack of competency and breaks down in tears if she gets things wrong. I think, where is this coming from? And I knew as I said it, it must come from me somehow. I know my Mom has a wicked case of this too.How Do We Begin to Consider Ourselves Heroes ? on Shalavee.com

And if it doesn’t come from me, it seeps insipidly in from society somehow. All those outdated devaluing women messages are still swirling around. No matter how many after school specials they’ve made, we are valued for our bodies not our aspirations and brains. Girls are worthless. Ha!

Except from where I stand, we’re worth more to the world than gold because we are running the underpinnings of life itself. We’ve been birthing people, feeding people, and keeping people occupied and educated for the past year. We’ve been disregarding ourselves for longer than we remember.  Many of us have had to be the breadwinners as well as the bakers. And deal with our family’s anxieties as well as our own. We take it like men? I don’t think any man can take it like this.

I’d like to see women stand and demand even more equal consideration for this unrecognized and uncompensated unseen work. Especially to their own families who take them for granted worse than anyone. I’m talking grassroots, “I’ve had enough of this shite” Sally Fields as Norma Rae kinda stuff. Who’s with me?

Interested in reading my future ponderings on Creative Soul Living? Subscribe, via the subscription box in the sidebar, to my weekly posts via your emailbox.

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I am a community kinda person and am always practicing Intentional Intouchness.

I live for conversations.

And, as always, Thanks to you for your visit.

What Personal Sustainability Looks Like

When we talk about environmental consciousness, “Sustainability” has become our buzzword referring to “meeting the needs of the present without compromising the ability of future generations to meet their needs”. Born in response to perceived public discontent over the long-term damage caused by a company’s focus on short-term profits, it has now entered my life’s vocabulary.

Personally, sustainability is how I make choices to live and not exhaust myself before I reach my goals. No goals? I think you just call that surviving. Or making do? I’ve been living a life without goals for a while and goals give me a place and a way to be proud of myself. So then the manner in which you choose to do this must be crafted and curated as to not sabotage yourself and do that burn out thing that seems so en vogue.

Creative Soul Living requires being both creative

and wise about our life choices

My sustainability starts with taking an inventory of my available time and how best to spread what I need to do over that time. This is tricky because we often get very gung ho about what we want to accomplish and unless we’re bipolar and spastic, we will overestimate our capabilities and our time and set ourselves up for feeling like failures pretty quickly.What Personal Sustainability Looks Like on Shalavee.com

As a mother, I have a lot less time than I think and a lot more. If I plan hard by meal-planning and delegation and just plain demanding my time away, I can eek out a few hours here or there for myself at home. I discovered that sustainability also has to do with pacing a diet. I can be Okay with a half a pound loss a week instead of a pound. And exercising. I am not going to all the classes I used to attend but rather showing up on the treadmill. And politely telling people I will be back soon.

Watching my boundaries to conserve my energy and time, as well as allowing for days that derail me due to illness or life happenstances, that is how I will allow the boat to stay afloat and going instead of abruptly tipping. Being realistic allows for patience, compassion, and understanding for ourselves. Sustainability will allow us to move however slowly but steadily toward the life we really want to be living. Creative Soul Living requires being both creative and wise about our life choices.

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Grow Where You Are Planted

After nearly a year of feeling the pinch of our collective sequestering, l’ve come to understand my ultimate importance.

I maintain my family and I care for myself.

The normalcy and the creativity are my realms.

We all need both of these to keep our sanity.

To feel that everything’s Okay in our tiny world but to also express our uniqueness.

To hear and feel ourselves getting in touch with our own inner voices.

That is what grounds me. Keeps me. Spurns me onward.

Because this isn’t about product.

This beautiful life we have a chance to live every day is about process.

And from a solid inspirational process comes products that exceed expectations.

Keep on Keeping on lovely people and honor yourselves for the lives you get to yet live.

Grow where you are planted.

 

Interested in reading my future thoughts on Creative Soul Living?

Enter your name into the subscription box in the sidebar to the right and subscribe to my bi-weekly posts via your emailbox.

Find me on Instagram to view my daily pictures,

friend me or like my page on Facebook.

I love community, soulful candid conversation, and being in touch.

And as always, thank you for your visit.

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